d100 Wondrous Items

Etching of a table cluttered with curiosities. A skull, a flower, scattered papers and open books, etc.

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“Wondrous Items” is the category where D&D puts all the good magic items. At their best they demand creativity from the players who possess them in a way that a Flaming Sword or Ring of Protection never could. Wondrous Items didn’t make the leap to video games the way so many of D&D’s other trappings did, because Wondrous Items require a tactically infinite environment in order to thrive.

Here I have endeavored to present the greatest diversity of physical objects I could, marrying each to a magic power intended to push players to engage with the game in new ways.

The treasure chest contains a…

  1. Knife which will expertly season any food prepared with it. Even a novice cook could significantly elevate the quality of their ingredients. The knife loses its enchantment permanently if it is ever used for violence.
  2. Saddle which will resize itself to fit any natural beast it’s placed on. Once the saddle is strapped in place that creature will behave as a well-trained mount for one day. After this the saddle falls off not matter how well secured. Some animals may resent having been ridden, and turn claws and fang upon their fallen rider.
  3. Book which records every conversation of the person who owns it. It does this no matter how far away its owner is. If a new person takes possession of the book (without having it explicitly lent to them by the owner), all its pages become blank
  4. Dry log which burns, but is never consumed by fire. Its owner never needs to gather another piece of firewood again. This log was probably cut from some very special tree, and probably has some much more amazing properties to it, but this is the only remarkable thing anyone has ever discovered about it.
  5. Battle standard which appears friendly to anyone who would recognize a battle standard. One could ride through two warring armies, and both forces would perceive them to be allies. If a person has no knowledge of flags or battle standards, it displays a gray-and-white checkered pattern.
  6. Set of magically silenced woodworking tools in a nice box. Hand drills of various sizes, files, saws, planes, a mallet, none of which will ever make a sound when in use.
  7. Winnowing basket which will sift objects according to any rules described to it. An excellent tool for finding needles in haystacks. For example, it might be told to sift a load of treasure for items worth more than 100 gp, after which any item worth less than that will fall right through the basket’s bottom regardless of its size. The imp bound to the basket cannot read, and refuses to learn, so any attempt to use scrabble tiles to turn the basket into a tedious oracle will not work.
  8. Mirror of capricious deceptions. It will never reflect reality properly, though most of the time the differences it displays are slight enough that one must study the image carefully to determine what’s wrong. Perhaps a ring is shown on the wrong finger, or cheeks are displayed more flush than they are. This isn’t always the case. When one least expects it the mirror will show a demon looming behind them, or spiders crawling out of the viewer’s nose. If someone spends a good Turn or two polishing the mirror to make it look its best, they may whisper a request to it and it will reflect one lie of their choosing.
  9. Pipe which, when lit and puffed on, produces great clouds of cloying, sight-obscuring smoke. If the pipe is loaded with any substance that carries a particular effect (hallucinogenics, poisons, narcotics, etc.) the cloud will also carry those effects, which must be Saved against by anyone in the vicinity. Note that the smoker is not immune, and must save along with everyone else.
  10. Tripod which folds down to fill the smallest unit of encumbrance the game uses. When fully opened up it’s large and strong enough to support the weight of a standard adventuring party.
  11. Bell of attention. For one moment after the bell is rung all eyes and ears will be focused on the ringer. It is up to them to be interesting enough to hold people’s attention after that first moment. If anyone hears the bell a second time within a single day, they will perceive that the ringer is attempting to control their minds with magic. People do not generally appreciate this, and will almost certainly turn violent towards the bell-bearer.
  12. Directional magnet, of the U-shaped variety. The magnetic field it projects is tightly focused on a single point, and is powerful enough to attract any metal object its pointed towards with 2 horsepower.
  13. Music box which suppresses all sound except the plink-plink-plink of its own music. A full wind lasts 3 minutes, after which it takes a few moments to wind up again. The silencing effect is exactly proportional to how well the music can be heard. Those near the box will hear absolutely nothing but the music, while those far enough away to hear the music only faintly will also experience all other sounds being slightly suppressed.
  14. Tent which rolls up as small as a pup tent. However, when properly put up, the tent is spacious enough to stand in, with several semi-private rooms. Additionally, there is an extra flap at the back of the tent which leads to an extra-dimensional reference library. This library is used by a variety of magicians across the planes, and tended by a dangerous librarian. No object may be taken from the library, but anyone willing to spend time there ought to be able to find the knowledge they’re seeking.
  15. Sponge capable of absorbing an abnormal amount of liquid. If thrown into a body of water it could soak up a good-sized lake. It never grows any larger or heavier no matter how much liquid it holds. A single squeeze will always release the whole volume at once.
  16. Wand which allows the wielder to ‘save’ up to ten outfits. They simply must dress themselves a certain way, then wave the wand over themselves from head to foot to store that outfit in extra-dimensional space. By thinking of the outfit and waving the wand over themselves again—from foot to head this time—the clothes will be returned to their body. There is nothing to prevent the wand from being used to store worn treasures, though it must be noted that one cannot switch partially between outfits.
  17. Scabbard which shapes itself to any weapon one wishes to put in it. When the wearer calls for their weapon, the scabbard will oblige by propelling the weapon out of itself. This is best used to instantaneously bring a weapon to hand, even if one is mid-grapple. One may also attempt to launch a weapon directly from the scabbard and towards an enemy, but this form of surprise attack is clumsy, and only rarely strikes successfully.
  18. Ball about the size and density of an apple. It is perfectly accurate within the range of the thrower’s strength, hitting whatever they were aiming at no matter how small or mobile. The ball is unlikely to do any serious harm if used as a weapon.
  19. Net with eight weights around its edge. Each weight has a button which causes it to stay exactly where it was when the button was pressed—even if that means levitating in mid-air. The magic which holds the weights is released if jostled. The net can thus be used to quickly set a simple snare in almost any environment.
  20. Board game with a subtle magic. Everyone who sits down to play it will have a comfortable understanding of the rules, without ever needing to learn them. The play of the game is as simple or as deep as is appropriate to the temperament of the players; and as short or as lengthy as the time they have available to play. Any creature who can be convinced to play will have a nice time, and will remember the party pleasantly.
  21. Key of Imaginary Transportation. When used to mime starting a car, the key enables the holder to also mime sitting down in a car, and driving at car-speeds. The magic lasts for as long as they continue to mime. It will instantly cease to work if they break character by speaking or taking action not possible with a car, or if they ram their imaginary car into something solid / try to take it where it could not reasonably go. If moving at speed, the sudden faltering of this magic can prove exceptionally dangerous. The imaginary car can carry a party’s worth of passengers and luggage.
  22. Wood barrel which will find its way back to its owner (with all its contents) one week after being cast away. It must be truly cast away in order for the magic to work: thrown into an ocean or river, given to a stranger as they leave town for parts unknown, etc. So long as the owner cannot reasonably retrieve the barrel themselves, the barrel’s magic will work, and it will return.
  23. Polished bronze torque which allows the wearer to lengthen or shorten their neck at will. Elongated necks are difficult to move with, but can coil like a snake, and even be climbed by allies. If the wearer is attacked, each additional foot of length their neck current has results in a 5% chance that a successful hit deals 5x its normal damage. (So for 1 extra foot, an attack roll of 20 deals 5x damage. For 2 extra feet it’s 19-20, for 3 extra feet 18-20, etc.)
  24. Mummified cat’s paw. When placed on an object, the paw causes that object (and itself) to immediately become buried ten feet under ground. The buried items can only be retrieved by digging, which may take more or less effort depending on the material they were buried in.
  25. Candle which will undo any harm that is done within the range of its light. The harm simply reverses itself when the candle naturally burns itself out as a stub. Note that the candle must be fully used up before its magic can take effect. If a person is killed in the candle’s light, but then the candle is snuffed out and not used up until 100 years later, then it will be 100 years before that person is revived. Candle burns for 4 hours.
  26. Fish hook that works its magic when slipped into someone’s clothes. An ethereal tether extends between the hook and the person who placed it, so that they always know which direction to go to find the target. If pulled on, the tether will drag the hooked person with magic force along the most expedient path to the one who placed the hook. The magic is undone if the hook is discovered, or if the hooked person changes clothes.
Two etchings of a hand holding a peculiar writing tool. They demonstrate that it ought to be held with its base resting in the palm, and its point guided by the index finger.
  1. Manacles of escaping. If a person goes to sleep while wearing them, they will awaken in a completely different situation. It will be some generally bad situation, such as rower on a slave galley, or prisoner in a foreign dungeon—but perhaps it is a better situation than the one which prompted the person to wear the manacles in the first place.
  2. Feather duster with a wooden handle that has been carved into the figure of a gossipy maid. When the duster is used to brush a layer of dust, the wooden gossip will come to life and tell the whole history of the room since that dust settled here. They know exactly how long it has been since someone passed through, what sort of creature they were, what they did, etc.
  3. Shears which imbue any hair they cut with magic properties. The person who holds a lock of hair cut by these shears is suffused with a subtle aura that makes it completely believable that they are best buds with the person whose hair they hold. Cut the hair of a king? Everyone you meet will believe you’re the king’s friend. The effect lasts until the person who’s hair was cut denies the relationship, after which that lock will never work on anyone again.
  4. Large vermilion folding fan. If a creature or object’s shadow falls upon the fan’s folds while it is opened, then the fan may be snapped closed to fold that creature or object away in extra-dimensional space. Whatever is stored in the fan will be released again the moment it is opened, believing that no time has passed. There are no limits to the size of objects stored, save that their entire shadow must fit on the folds of the fan.
  5. Gloves capable of magically producing cord of any commonly available type and thickness between them. It may be ropes, chains, fishing line, twine, etc. The cord can be attached to the gloves, or released from them, but will never be any longer than the width to which the wearer can stretch their arms.
  6. Metal stud for wearing in a pierced tongue. While worn, the wearer gains a sticky frog’s tongue with 5 feet of reach.
  7. Steel bucket which is able to produce twenty times the amount of sand, water, gravel, or any other useless material it is filled with.
  8. Gardening trowel. If used to dig a shallow trench, and that trench is filled with water, the little furrow will expand to become a full-sized moat.
  9. Vase which “melts” any metal placed into it down to a liquid state. If one then whispers a shape into the vase and pours the metal out, it will “cool” and form itself into the shape desired. One can form the metal into coins, or statues, or bricks, or balls. The process is quick and does not involve any heat.
  10. Quill and ink-pot that imbue any words they write with supernatural comprehensibility. They can be read and understood even people people who do not read the language they are written in, people who are entirely illiterate, and even by creatures who lack language entirely. Even a mindless zombie or an alien slug could understand what is written.
  11. Lockpicking tools which work on people’s hearts. If someone skilled in legerdemain is able to sneak up on an unconscious person, or do their work on a restrained person, they can use these tools to “open” the person’s heart, and place some new love inside of it.
  12. False mustache cut from the lip of a great warrior who was cast out of his tribe, and ritually deprived of this symbol of his manhood. When it tied by straps to be worn on a person’s face, the mustache grants the ability to tell absolutely superb war stories.
  13. Farming scythe. If passed backwards over some dead thing, that thing will very briefly be brought back to life. It may be a few minutes, or an hour, but they will shortly return to death.
  14. Crowbar which is a magical force multiplier, in addition to being a mundane one. If an average person uses it, it will be as though 10 burly strongmen are all helping them. Note that this functions only when the crowbar is used as a lever, not if it’s used as a cudgel.
  15. Bright clear crystal which cleans any room it’s left in. Nothing will happen while one watches, but leaving it alone for only a few moments will eliminate dust and detritus, put items back in their proper place, brighten paint, etc.
  16. Folded fortune teller made of browned and tattered papyrus. If placed in a dead person’s hands, the hands will move to open and close the fortune teller. Back and forth, accelerating rapidly, until a choice is made, and an inky rune is revealed, taking immediate effect (d8): 1-3: Speak With Dead, 4: An illusory scene appears, depicting this dead creature’s final moments of life, and how they came to be where they are. 5. Raise the dead as a powerful undead revenant which loathes the living. 6. Raise the dead as a simple creature under the command of the caster. 7. Animate the dead, and return the creature’s mind to it, for one day. Experience of the afterlife will have made them weird, and they will likely have their own unfinished business they want to attend to. 8. The body explodes, splattering those nearby with blood, and leaving nothing left for a magician to tamper with.
  17. Straw whisk tied with simple cord. If waved vigorously in the air, the whisk will make a huge mess of any room. Anything that isn’t nailed down will be scattered pell mell.
  18. Quizzing glass which allows its wielder to see through another’s eyes. They simply need orient the glass towards any creature with eyes, and it will display what that creature is seeing.
  19. Complex and awkward vestment which must be actively held together by one hand in order to be worn, precluding the use of other weapons or tools. The garment takes a full Turn to don or doff, but while it is worn anything a person says is significantly more compelling. If one uses a 2d6 reaction roll, this vestment would enable the wearer to roll 2d8 instead.
  20. Grappling hook which falls up. It’s prongs have a jagged zig-zag pattern, as stylized lightning bolts. If allowed to reach 100′ in height, a lightning bolt will flash from the sky to catch the hook, and carry it away. The hook—and anyone holding on to its rope—will be transported [d12 * 10] miles towards the destination of their choosing. The travel is instantaneous, but dangerous, as everyone going on the journey must make a saving throw or take 2d6 damage from the lightning bolt.
  21. Wagon with a hatch door in its bed. Beyond the door are stairs which lead into an extra-dimensional cellar. Cool, dry, and with plenty of space for storage. There is a door in the cellar which is heavily barred on the other side.
  22. Statue of a roaring leopard carved from tufa. It has a perfectly ordinary appearance, but has been enchanted so that if someone tells a lie while their hand is in the leopard’s mouth, it will snap closed hard enough to crush bone, and won’t release until they reveal the truth that they lied to protect.
  23. Rustic hat with a wide shady brim. The shade cast by the hat is variable depending on how tight or loose the band around its rim is fitted. The wearer can vary the shadow to be simply personal, or up to 20′ in diameter. Anyone within this shade is immune to magical spying, and will appear to be a mere trick of the light to anyone observing from more than 60 feet away.
  24. Clay jug filled with three corrupting ichors: Slurry of Instantaneous Decay, Ooze of Malignant Mutation, and Vinegar of Undousable Incineration. The three fluids occupy the same space within the jug, each filling it entirely, but never mixing with one another. One never knows which one will come out when the jug is tipped, and no other vessel can safely contain these three potent liquids. The jug contains one gallon of each.
Etching of a woman with a black cat sitting beside a table of men. The men are drinking, with swords, axes, and shields resting nearby. The woman leans forward as if to intimidate them, and some men appear cowed, while others are defiant.
  1. Buff coat which makes anyone who wears it appear to be the most physically powerful person in the world. All bulging muscle and towering height. This strength is entirely illusory.
  2. Prop sword which is obviously fake and not at all threatening. Anyone touched by the blade will perceive that they’ve been stabbed by a real weapon, and react accordingly. To anyone watching, however, the object is clearly harmless. They’ll think the person who was “stabbed” is wildly overreacting.
  3. Wooden pole which can be pressed down to 2 feet long, or stretched out to 15 feet long at the wielder’s preference. On one end of the pole is a willowy wooden hand which the wielder of the pole can manipulate as easily as they do their own hand.
  4. Roll of cotton bandage which surreptitiously draws out more blood from any wound it binds. Unless used on a very minor cut, the bandaged person will bleed out and die without ever realizing that they haven’t been properly tended to.
  5. Domed birdcage with a little locking door, large enough to fit most tiny creatures inside. Any such creature placed within gains a humanlike intelligence and understanding of itself, as well as the ability to speak, and a desire to be pleasing and cooperative. This state is very uncomfortable for the animal. They don’t want to be rude, but they would really very much like to get the heck out of this cage as soon as possible.
  6. Small statue which watches and listens. When picked up it will describe everything it has seen and heard since the last time it was set down. If only recently rediscovered after being left alone somewhere for many years, this may be a lengthy and tedious recitation.
  7. Wrought iron fire poker. Each time it touches a fire, that fire will double in size. Fortunately, irresponsible wielders of this item will kill themselves long before they pose an existential threat to the whole region.
  8. Mousetrap of the spring bar & board style. When the jaw is pulled back and locked in place the weight of the trap increases to ten tons, and it will remain in this magically-heavy state until the trap arm is fully closed. Few creatures will be strong enough to escape the trap, and their own trapped foot or hand will prevent the bar from closing enough to dispel the magic.
  9. Small brazier, in which burns a magic fire. Legend has it this is the first fire made by human hands, kept burning through the eons by careful tending. If it ever goes out the magic is lost forever, but so long as it still burns, any creature close enough to be warmed by its heat will be healed 1hp every 2 Turns.
  10. Glass thermometer with a plug at its top. It’s meant to be filled with a few drops of a person’s blood, rather than with mercury. It will then display hotter temperatures when it is closer to that person, and cooler temperatures when it is further away from them.
  11. Parasol which stores the current weather at the moment it’s opened. Closing the parasol then conjures that same weather regardless of place or time. For example the parasol might be opened in the arctic during a blizzard, then kept open until it can be closed in an arid desert to really mess with the local environment. Of course, an open parasol is an awkward thing to move around, and cannot be easily kept in one’s bags.
  12. Comb which will quickly ferret out any needles hiding in haystacks, or any other aberrant objects that have been lost in a material fine enough to be ‘combed’ through.
  13. Twelve marbles which accurately and unerringly roll and bounce anywhere their user desires, within the range of a thumb flick. This is not limited to a single target or semi-natural path. They will zig-zag, hop, and backtrack as needed to accomplish their wielder’s goals. This is the only power which the marbles wish their wielder to access. Together they are an object of immense cosmic power, with a will all their own. On any given flick there is a 1-in-20 chance that the marbles will choose to become lost, having decided their time with the player character is done. The marbles do not move with enough force to deal damage to most creatures.
  14. Maraca filled with the broken teeth of the dead. Shaking it draws the attentions of nearby ghosts, causing at least one to appear (1d6 – 3, min 1). Ghosts are not friendly, but they know many secrets which were taken with them to the grave, and will sometimes trade what they know in exchange for the characters acting as their living agents in some way. Often what they want is minor, but never is it wholesome.
  15. Satchel of wood blocks. They’re brightly colored, come in various shapes, and are of a style a child might play with. They may be arranged however the user would like. A single clap causes the blocks to grow to become structure sized, while three claps in rapid succession cause them to shrink down to normal. Note that while they could be used to build a little house for the night, the blocks are not affixed to one another, and would make for a somewhat unstable structure.
  16. Sand timer which lasts 10 minutes. When the sand runs through to the bottom chamber, the hourglass and the person who set it in motion will jump backwards in time 10 minutes. Very handy for testing out uncertain actions, since you’re guaranteed a second try. Be warned, however, that the timer can’t be stopped once started, and there’s a 1-in-12 chance for each use that the timer will jump back without the person who turned it, disappearing from their reality, and leaving them stuck with whatever actions they’ve taken.
  17. Line measure of the type commonly used aboard boats. When lowered into a body of water the line causes that body to be at least as deep as the line. A shallow puddle could be made into a 15-foot-deep pool by lowering 15 feet of the line into it. Note that the magic does not actually create more water, it simply causes the water that exists to bi-locate or multi-locate into extra-dimensional space.
  18. Conductor’s baton. When pointed at an object or creature, that thing’s movement begins to produce a musical sound. If pointed at a rat, every scurrying movement and twitch of whiskers will produce melodic tones, which will merge nicely with other tones produced by other moving objects, revealing a sort of music underlying the ecology of a space. Once the baton is used, the thing indicated will continue to produce sound until the next sunrise.
  19. Plumage arrayed in a crest, with a bolt for affixing it to a helmet. Whomever wears it may see and speak with the ghost of the long dead bird whose feathers adorn the crest. The bird is of a large sort which has long since ceased to exist anywhere in the world. It’s not kindly disposed towards the descendants of primates which wear its feathers, but will grudgingly scout for them, and offer mostly accurate information. Doing the bidding of primates is moderately preferable to existing in the tedious limbo the bird returns to whenever the crest is not being worn.
  20. Blanket which traps any 1 person who sleeps with it in a fuzzy, two-dimensional prison. While there they perceive time, but suffer no hunger, thirst, or other basic need. Shaking the blanket causes them to come tumbling out of it.
  21. Stained glass in a 2 foot by 2 foot wood frame, depicting a sleeping dragon. The magic of this device must be attuned to a room by hanging it in a window long enough for one full cycle of moonlight to shine through it. After which the dragon recognizes this room as the location of its hoard. The glass may be carried anywhere in the world, and functions as a small portal back to that room. Any objects placed on the stained glass will disappear when no one is looking, and can be found later in the dragon’s hoard room.
  22. Length of chain 15′ from end-to-end. If lain in a circle, only true promises may be spoken within. It does not lay a geas on the promise-maker, but it does prevent them from speaking if they lack the intention and the will to carry their promise through.
  23. Locket capable of binding a willing soul to this world. It must be placed on the dead person’s body before the body grows cold, after which the soul may be asked to remain awhile before moving on. If they agree, they will appear in the locket as a tiny portrait capable of speech. Being stuck in a locket is dreadfully tedious, and the amount of time any soul is willing to stay there will range from hours to weeks, but not longer.
  24. Razor-sharp scalpel which can cut into living flesh without causing any pain, and any damage caused by its cuts heals itself within a few hours.
  25. Dirty rag of cloth which must be worn in some way in order to work its magic. It might be used as a pocket square, a kerchief, or just lain on top of one’s head. The rag then causes it to appear as though everything the user is wearing or carrying is trash. If they were to hold up a gold coin, it would look like a rock to everyone else. They will be dismissed as a beggar or a dirt farming peasant.
  26. Hide of a great animal treated with magic oils. Three people holding its edges can hurl a fourth person 30′ in the air, after which they will drift gently and safely back to the ground. Each additional person adds 10′ to how high the bouncer can be thrown, up to a maximum of 10 people hurling someone 100′.
An etching depicting an assortment of farm tools. Saws, shears, knives, a bell, ladders, a wheelbarrow, a bucket, a hammer, and a few items of unclear function.
  1. Rake which creates a magical one-way window through any surface it’s dragged across. Each stroke of the rake causes the window to show a space 10 feet deeper. So, for example, if there is a secret cultist den 20 feet underground, then raking the surface a single time will show whatever earth is 10′ below the spot, and raking the surface a second time will show the cultist’s hideout.
  2. Perfume spritzer which causes any ol’ liquid placed inside it to smell like delicious food when sprayed. “Delicious” here being relative to the nose that smells it.
  3. Bar of soap which is most effectively used when one is fully dressed. Not only does it clean the user perfectly, but it also removes minor bruises and abrasions, performs minor mending to clothes, polishes gear until it gleams, and otherwise removes all signs of wear and tear.
  4. Bicycle with a peculiar lever on its handle bar. Any distance covered while riding this bike can be instantaneously un-covered by pulling on the lever. The bike and rider are teleported immediately to where they started from. This option is lost the moment the rider dismounts the bike.
  5. Torch made from treated hardwoods which will never burn down so long as the cloth fuel is replaced regularly. Carvings indicate a particular way of holding the torch (somewhat awkwardly) which causes its flame to stay in whatever air it moves through. Somewhat like the images that are left behind by moving the torch quickly, except semi-permanent and still as hot as ever. With a little patience a person could create a wall of torch fire to close up a corridor, for example. Once placed, the fire remains until the wielder adjusts their grip on the torch.
  6. Ball of yarn with little wisps of smoke twirling off it. When dropped, it will tend to roll towards something that deserves the dropper’s attention. It may indicate secret doors, trap triggers, the hiding spot of a foe waiting in ambush, or just a good deal at market. Each time the yarn is dropped, a few inches of its length burns away, until there’s not enough left for it to have any use.
  7. Paper envelope, appropriate to contain a folded piece of paper. When closed with a wax seal, and words describing a destination location are etched on the wax, a gust of wind will whisk the envelope (and anything it carries) away towards that destination. The location can be anywhere, so long as it is a specific place. “Tom’s desk on the second floor office of his home in Bluehaven” will work. “Tom’s current location” will not. The wind carries the envelope about as fast as a bird flies.
  8. Snow globe which contains a small village. If placed down somewhere and rubbed with the hand, a person can be transported into the village. There they can access the goods and services of the town, and when they wish to leave they merely need to rub the glass dome from the inside to pop out again. The villagers are fully aware of their condition. This place is a purgatory for them, where they are punished for terrible sins committed in life. If they can behave like decent people for for 100 years they’ll get to be reborn, and have a second chance at living a good life. If the snow globe is smashed while someone is inside, they will be trapped at that smaller size until some alternate means of growing large can be found.
  9. Pale blue paste flecked with silver. Safe to touch with the fingers for spreading, but a mere moment after being spread the paste hardens to the strength of iron welds.
  10. Broom which produces a strong gust of wind in whatever direction it’s swept towards. Strong enough to cause an unsuspecting person to stumble, or to propel a sailing ship. There is no limitation on the frequency this item can be used, though note that once a foe gets used to the wind it will have almost no impact on their ability to act.
  11. Tiny catapult, small enough to fit in a backpack. A peculiar spigot allows it to be “inflated” to full size by blowing or using a bellows. At full size it is just as sturdy and heavy as any other catapult, yet if the spigot is opened it will release all the air pumped into it and the catapult will return to its small size.
  12. Plow which digs furrows that are potent with fertile magic which will grow plants from any item as if it were a seed. Plant a sword, get a sword tree. Plant a gold coin, get a gold coin flower. The plants require a normal amount of time and care to develop, and the items they produce will not replicate any magic or artistry present in the original seed. For example, a gold coin will not produce a flower with the same image stamped on it.
  13. Whetstone, long with two flat sides. Twelve strokes will hone any blade to a set purpose. The first side hones a blade to fighting trim, and could make a butter knife dagger-sharp. The second side forms a worker’s edge, allowing even a delicate rapier to chop trees like an axe, or strike stone with its point like a pick.
  14. Belt buckle in the shape of an alligator’s head. A whistle brings the buckle to life, and it can move about using the belt its attached to to push itself along the ground. Its abilities are limited, but it will do whatever it’s asked. Once awakened the alligator will not go back to sleep until it is fed.
  15. Scale which is able to weigh values other than weight. A dial on its base allows it to be set to measure monetary value, cultural value, academic value, spiritual value, and probably a few other sorts of value as well. In order to be of any use, the scale must have something to be weighed against. A gold coin to measure monetary value, or a holy symbol to measure spiritual value, for example.
  16. Spectacles which allow the wearer to see a number above the head of any property-owning creature, showing the net value of their assets.
  17. Whip which tangles expertly and perfectly every time. Able to quickly grab a far ledge, or reliably initiate a distance grapple against a foe. When targeting a living creature the wielder must roll a d20 all the same, and if a 1 is rolled the whip deals draws blood, and deals 1 hp of damage. Contact with blood causes it to lose its magic until ritually purified for 30 days and 31 nights.
  18. Veil of coarse thread, but hemmed elaborately. When worn it reduces vision to indistinct shapes. Putting it on and wandering aimlessly for d6 + 3 turns will lead a person to a safe place. There is food, potable water, shelter, and safety from attack. (All relative to the environment. Where the veil leads in a dungeon or desert will be different than where it would lead in a lush countryside or city). The veil wearer may bring as many people as they like with them, led in a chain of hands, all with eyes closed. While wandering the wearer and followers are guided by the veil’s magics, and will remain safe from harm or violent encounters. However, if anyone opens their eyes, or if the veil wandering is halted before its proper end, the wanderers will invariably find themselves in a terribly dangerous situation. The veil’s magic is able to lead the wearer, but cannot phase them through bars if they’re locked in a cell, or divert a determined foe from killing them if donned mid-combat.
  19. Casket of dark citrus wood. If a person is properly buried in this casket, then the very next day a tree will have grown where they were put to rest. High in the branches of the tree is a book, or perhaps several, which contain every noteworthy piece of information which this individual took with them to the grave.
  20. Censer which produces smoke of special divinatory power. After a space has been thoroughly filled with its fumes, items and marks which are evidence of some wrongdoing will glow a faint yellow. The censer reveals anything that points towards violence, deceit, oath-breaking, or willful disregard towards the welfare of others.
  21. Rug, blue with floral patterns at its edges. About 3′ wide, and 30′ long. When rolled out it’s stiff enough to serve as a bridge, and tough enough to form a short barricade. Only the very ends remain pliable, and allow the rug to be rolled up again.
  22. Empty turtle’s shell which, when placed in water, propels itself at incredible speeds. If the user is able to keep hold of it (no easy task!) they may learn the nuances of movement which allow them to guide its course, and move through the water with the speed and grace of any marine animal.
  23. Embroidery hoop which allows objects to be stored as images on fabric. The fabric must be held firmly in place by the hoop, after which anything from a dagger to a dog can be placed on the taut cloth. The placed item will disappear, existing now only as an embroidered image. At any time the cloth can be torn to break the enchantment and release whatever was stored there.
  24. City seed. Heavy and awkward. When planted, it will overnight grow into a bustling town filled with people who believe in a fictional history of their lives and their town.

That’s another d100 table on the books! I hope you enjoyed it, and that you’re happy, healthy, and getting vaccinated!

The Dungeon d100s: Rewards

(An Italian translation of this post is available on Dragons’ Lair)

Nothing on this list is meant to be exchanged for money, nor could most of it be described as “magic items” in the traditional sense. Both those things are excellent rewards for players to find in dungeons. Both have even been subjects for my own writing, (see d100 Objects of Moderate Value, or the Magic Items subheading of my Index). However, my goal with this table is to focus on the sorts of treasures that are often neglected when planning a dungeon. Things like relationships, information, opportunities to be creative, unusual tools, character modifications, and access to tremendous and terrible power.

Like any reward from a dungeon, these objects must be earned. Once cannot simply place “friendship with an elder red dragon” inside a chest. Instead the players might find an elder red dragon whose tail was caught in a massive bear trap, and was left here to starve while adventurers looted his treasure horde. Other rewards on this list might be better suited to being quest rewards. For example, a king will listen to the party on matters of public policy if they go into the dungeon and take care of this’n’that for them.

The Dungeon d100s
1 – Themes
2 – Structures
3 – Rewards
4 – Doors, Floors, Walls, & Ceilings
5 – Factions
6 – Locks & Keys

Bonus – Auto-roller, at Liche’s Libram.

d100 Dungeon Rewards:

  1. A printing press.
  2. A fine fleet of chariots.
  3. Some well constructed bit of mobile siege equipment, such as a catapult or scorpion.
  4. Complex siege equipment which must be disassembled for transport, such as trebuchets or rolling towers.
  5. A supply of a rare material with incredible properties. Something like mithril or gopher wood.
  6. A ship in good condition.
  7. A war tank, perhaps brought here by a time warp, or a remnant from an ancient magical empire.
  8. A backhoe, cement mixer, bulldozer, steamroller, or other piece of time-warped industrial construction equipment or its ancient magical counterpart.
  9. A supply of absolutely primo drugs. They do all the stuff you like, none of the stuff you don’t like, and there’s enough of it to throw the world’s greatest party.
  10. A bank of unknown seeds with a supply sufficient for long term cultivation. They may be from a far distant land, extinct local flora, or from some entirely alien world.
  11. Command over a great orbiting eye (or telescope if your game allows for it) which can communicate its observations from space.
  12. Access to a heretofore unknown deposit of natural resources. A rich vein of precious metals, a well of oil, etc.
  13. A massive cache of supplies. Stuff like food, medicine, or war materiel. Enough to solve a famine, alleviate a plague, or outfit an army.
  14. A legitimate coin press, or a convincing counterfeit one. Enables the owner to create fake currency if they wish.
  15. An artifact from the future left behind by a clumsy time traveler. It could be information that advances the party’s knowledge, some bit of useful tech like a flashlight or motorcycle, or a weapon like a ray gun.
  16. A specialized encryption machine, which allows some certain group to send secret messages to one another. None has ever fallen into the wrong hands before, and with it the party could intercept highly sensitive messages.
  17. Access to a secret and wide ranging communications network, enabling the players to pass messages quickly and effectively over great distances. Alternately, the players may have the opportunity to exploit or disrupt such a network.
  18. A single-use item of tremendous restorative power. Using it could end a plague, or resurrect a dead army.
  19. A single-use item of tremendous destructive power. Essentially a briefcase sized atom bomb.
  20. A single-use item of tremendous transportation power. Enough that a whole city could be gracefully moved to another planet or plane of existence with the snap of a finger.
  21. An artifact of religious or historical significance which would alter what is commonly believed. The powers that be are probably threatened by this.
  22. Some bit of culture lost to history. Something like extra verses of Gilgamesh, a forgotten board game, or the lost writings of an ancient philosopher.
  23. An imprisoned dungeon delver. If freed they will join your party at least to the end of the dungeon, and if you impress them, may continue on as a hireling.
  24. A kidnapped prisoner, brought to the dungeon against their will. Are they known to be missing? Were they replaced by a doppelganger? Regardless of other circumstances, they will be grateful to be rescued.
  25. The friendship of a skilled professional of some kind, happy to perform some free work for the party. They may be a craftsperson, a lawyer, an accountant, a guide, an engineer, an artist, etc.
  26. The friendship of an individual or a group with the ability to easily access spaces which might be out of reach for the players. For example, merfolk, ghosts, harpies, mole men, desert worm riders, or plane hoppers.
  27. The friendship of an individual or a group which is usually intractably isolationist, or at least opposed to forming friendships with people of the player character’s type. Perhaps wood elves, faeries, or members of an enemy nation.
  28. The friendship of a great and terrible beast which might normally be inclined to eat you, like a troll or dragon.
  29. The friendship of a person who is highly placed within some powerful system. An aristocrat, military officer, or postmaster general.
  30. A group of slaves whom the party can set free. Some of them may choose to join the party, others will spread stories of their heroism, while still others might be positioned to offer substantive rewards once they get home.
  31. Animals of a heretofore unknown type. They might be alien creatures, dinosaurs frozen in ice, dodo birds surviving in a sealed valley, or anything in between. They could be useful for exotic meat, domestic labor, companionship, or merely as curiosities. There are enough to breed a healthy population.
  32. A golem or robot imprints itself on you. It follows wherever you lead and tirelessly performs any task you set it to. It is limited by rudimentary intelligence and creativity, and perhaps a lack of agility.
  1. An ethereal servitor imprints itself on you.
  2. The companionship of an animal which is not normally attainable as a pet. It may be an elephant, rhinoceros, hippopotamus, elk, cheetah, etc. The animal is already trained, understands basic commands, and will aid you so long as it is well treated.
  3. An object with no significant trade value or use value, but which would be the perfect gift for a particular person in the game world. Perhaps a lost painting of a king’s dead lover, or the childhood toy of an elder dragon.
  4. The opportunity to create a new spell, ignoring many of the normal restrictions on time, cost, or scope.
  5. The opportunity to craft a powerful weapon or suit of armor, ignoring many of the normal restrictions on time, cost, or scope.
  6. The opportunity to use a rapid evolution device to guide a new form of animal into existence, matching specifications you set within a certain margin of error.
  7. The opportunity to plan a public works project on the scale of a bridge, road, bath house, grain dole, etc. The party will not need to pay for creating or maintaining this project.
  8. The opportunity to dictate what the production of a factory will be over a given period, and what will be done with the items produced. Players may wish to outfit an army, take a new product to market, or introduce new technology to society.
  9. Temporary command over a work force of builder elves. In a single night they will build any construction that is described to them.
  10. The opportunity to direct the efforts of a team of scientists or engineers towards a problem of the player characters’ choosing.
  11. The opportunity to establish a charity which will tackle some particular social ill.
  12. The opportunity to direct an angry mob towards a particular target.
  13. For a fraction of a second the character becomes a god. Just enough time to make a single world-altering decision. The other gods are swift to put the character back in their proper place, but will not undo this one change.
  14. The opportunity to advise someone powerful about how they ought to proceed. To influence the social policies of a king, or the military tactics of a general. This advice will be followed unless it would be suicidally absurd to do so.
  15. The opportunity to lay down the precepts of a new religion, or life philosophy, which will be adhered to (and no doubt eventually distorted to some degree) by a community of peoples.
  16. A clearly stated and completely accurate prophecy describing an a celestial, geological, or otherwise uncontrollable event. A solar eclipse, a falling meteor, an erupting volcano, a monarch dying or birthing an heir, etc. Only you know this thing will happen.
  17. A clearly stated and accurate prophecy describing an event which could be altered if you choose to pursue it. Someone being murdered, the outcome of a battle or an election, etc.
  18. Knowledge to any one secret in the world, so long as a single person exists who knows about it.
  19. The opportunity to ask an omnipotent intelligence a single question, and receive a fully detailed answer.
  20. The opportunity to ask an omnipotent intelligence three yes-or-no questions, which will be answered honestly and accurately.
  21. All the details of someone’s plans or battle strategies, or perhaps diagrams which describe their defensive arrangements in detail.
  22. Genealogical records which could alter someone’s social position. A member of or friend to the party may find that they’re actually a minor noble, or even in line of succession for the crown. Alternately these records might reveal that some aristocrat’s lineage has been faked.
  23. Evidence which disproves a criminal or embarrassing claim made against the party, friend of the party, or employer of the party. The evidence may or may not be faked, but it is convincing.
  24. Evidence which proves that one of the party’s foes has committed a serious crime, which they will otherwise get away with. Alternately, evidence of a conspiracy the party wishes to expose.
  25. Blackmail sufficiently damning to earn concessions from some person or group. The strength of the blackmail will determine how much the blackmailer can get for it.
  26. A pirate’s map, complete with annotations, passwords for safe rooms, several uncharted islands, and a few spots marked X.
  27. A map to an abandoned tower, castle, city, fleet of warships, or other sturdy construction left over from a previous era. It belongs to anyone who wants to lay claim to it.
  28. A map of a place the player characters would be familiar with. The map reveals hidden passages, buried treasures, forgotten underground structures, or other lost knowledge.
  29. A complete map of this, or some other dungeon, with enough information to make plundering dramatically easier.
  30. Access to an unknown hideyhole which allows someone to spy easily on some incredibly secret location, such as a monarch’s private audience chamber.
  31. Instructions for replicating some secret technology which has become lost. Ulfberht steel, roman concrete, greek fire, brilliantly blue paint, etc.
  32. A map which highlights a valuable traveling route, such as a quick path through a difficult range of mountains, directions that would allow ships to avoid rocks and sandbars in a treacherous river, the safe path through a minefield, or route through an impenetrable marsh.
  33. Access to a magic tunnel which, when crawled through, allows the crawler to temporarily inhabit the body of some notable figure in the game world. At the end of their time, they consistently appear at some place a few miles from the tunnel access.
  34. A control panel for activating some particular catastrophe. Perhaps an earthquake, a tsunami, a meteor, an ice age, etc. The players cannot choose what the disaster is, only where, when, and whether it will happen.
  1. Access to the settings for creation. The power of magnetism, the rate of evolution, etc. Curiously, gravity is currently set to 120% normal strength.
  2. The services of an expert assassin who will eliminate any one person of your choosing. No cost. Success guaranteed.
  3. Command over an army or navy of the damned who will be freed when a certain condition is met. It could be when they win their next battle, when they recapture a certain territory, or avenge an ancient wrong.
  4. The opportunity for characters to clone themselves. It may be that the clone is immediately active, or may be kept dormant. The clone may have complete free will, or be willing to defer to the original.
  5. The opportunity to time travel. This might be subject to any number of limitations (one way and permanent, only within the travelers lifetime, only outside their lifetime, only backwards in time, the traveler can only exist outside their proper time for a few moments, the list goes on.)
  6. The opportunity to stop time the whole world over, allowing the player characters some set period (a few hours/a day/a week) in which they may act before time sets itself into motion once again.
  7. The opportunity to open a door between our world and another. The pathway will be large, permanent, and accessible to many people on both sides. The inhabitants of both worlds will begin to mingle, and influence one another in unpredictable ways.
  8. The chance to bestow a curse of misfortune on someone, such that all their current prosperity will leave them, and all their future ventures will fail, until some condition is met.
  9. A large seed which, when planted, will spread and grow rapidly. In a single afternoon it will produce a whole forest of trees.
  10. The opportunity to parley on friendly terms with a powerful creature. Anywhere from an elder dragon, to a god.
  11. The opportunity to undo a single mistake from the characters past. It must be a choice they made, not just a roll they failed. The change may have unintended consequences.
  12. The opportunity to remove a single person from existence. They will have never existed, and much of what they’ve done
  13. The players find themselves in just the right place at just the right time to influence a war that is well beyond their ken. Some conflict between solar empires, or between the gods themselves. The choice the players make will tip the scales.
  14. A character is inducted into an auspicious order. In addition to potential social benefits, they may gain class features not normally available to their class. For example, they might be declared paladins, and gain a Smite Evil ability.
  15. An upgrade to a skill, spell, or ability the character already possesses. A spell which deals d4 damage may now deal d6; a skill may now be able to ignore certain limitations; An ability may be usable more times per day; etc.
  16. The opportunity to combine their genetic makeup with another creature in some beneficial way. Gaining bird’s wings, or the speed of a cheetah, or the dignified mane of a lion, etc.
  17. The opportunity to subject themselves to a random beneficial mutation.
  18. The opportunity for characters to alter their physical selves. Change their height, sex, age, reroll one or more stats, and even their species to whatever they want.
  19. The opportunity to work with a teacher or therapist who can help characters learn a new skill, or remove some mental hindrance.
  20. Magical or mechanical replacements for lost body parts, which function just as well (or perhaps better) than natural ones.
  21. Experimental body modifications. Adrenaline boosters, sub-dermal armor, internal potion injectors, etc.
  22. Become immune to some specified thing: burns from fire, inhaled poisons, axes, etc.
  23. Secret techniques for better living. Perhaps breathing techniques which double the length of time breath can be held, exercises which grant a set amount of temporary hit points each day they are performed, or sleeping methods which allow a full night’s rest in a scant few hours.
  24. A shipment of stolen goods which, if returned, would prevent a sea captain or merchant from going bankrupt.
  25. Documents which prove that an obscure law or treaty is still in effect. It may become repealed, but until it is the player characters can abuse it to some advantage.
  26. The ability to understand and speak with something unusual. Birds, cats, fish, trees, etc.
  27. The opportunity to perform a profoundly good deed, such as releasing a thousand imprisoned souls. Performing the good deed is trivial, but offers no tangible personal benefit.
  28. A key needed to access something in another dungeon, or a bank vault, or to bypass security somewhere.
  29. The remains of some notable figure who disappeared mysteriously. Perhaps a noted political reformer, a heroic adventurer, or a renowned artist. Apparently they met their end in this dungeon.
  30. The remains of a ghost or phylactery of a lich, enabling the characters to send some wayward spirit to its proper rest.
  31. The opportunity to undergo a ritual which will allow characters to become ghosts (or perhaps other forms of undead) when they die.
  32. Alternate versions of common spells which are dramatically more effective, but are more difficult to cast. Perhaps they have a longer casting time, require multiple casters, or have expensive material components.
  33. Access to a great tunnel through the underdark which allows travelers to bypass some surface danger, such as a terrible desert, marsh, or enemy nation.
  34. Access to one or more magical portals, which could transport a person instantaneously to set locations throughout the world, or even to different planes and planets.

Also, defund the police.

d100 Objects of Moderate Value

We already know that coins are boring treasure. I mean, a sack of gold is fine now and again, but in general, treasure is a lot cooler when it’s some kind of valuable object.

I’ve got this bad habit, though. Anytime I go to make a treasure object, I make something of phenomenal quality. An item whose manufacture exceeds what ought to be possible with the technology available in my game world. It’s fun to let your imagination run wild, and describe solid gold cat statue of perfect lifelike quality. But when you go wild describing an object, you’ve got to give it an impressive value in coins to match. And before you know it you’ve unbalanced your game’s economy again.

It’s more interesting if treasure is down to earth. Something the player can expect to earn a few hundred coin for; but not the lost opus of some ancient master craftsperson. In the end it just makes sense if most valuable objects are a little bit mundane.

  1. An unfinished painting commissioned for a duchess who died before it could be completed. The painting is only a little more than half done.
  2. A tribal mask from a far off land, carved from a single piece of wood.
  3. A brass tree, with many twisting branches of thick wire. Tree is flat, meant to hang on a wall.
  4. An ancient clay vase, cracked down the side. Was clearly decorated at one time, but most of the paint has chipped off.
  5. A 4′ picture frame of mahogany, inlayed with pearls at each corner. No picture inside of it.
  6. An intact piece of old correspondence which sheds some light on a minor historical mystery.
  7. An erotic candelabra depicting a nude woman with her back arched, and her breasts pointing straight up. A pair of candles can be mounted where her areola ought to be.
  8. The embroidered green vestments a priest might wear on special holy days.
  9. An erotic sundial depicting a man reclining, with a large erection casting a shadow on the disc.
  10. A jewlery box of birch, with braided steel trim. The box is empty.
  11. A fine wood chalice with gold inlaid on the interior of the cup. Religious symbols are carved into the base.
  12. A steel monstrance with eight rays radiating from the center. The hinge is rusted shut.
  13. An oversized stein, large enough that it would be difficult to lift safely to your lips with one hand. Decorated with art of men on horseback hunting a boar.
  14. A small ivory bust depicting a veiled woman on one side, and a skeleton on the other.
  15. A silver hairbrush, decorated with spiral ivy patterns. Most of the bristles are missing.
  16. A jade comb with a simple spiral pattern at the center. Has one missing tooth.
  17. Steel thinning-shears with a gold handle.
  18. A steel hand mirror with a handle shaped to look like an angel. The angels wings rise up on either side to frame the glass, their points meeting at the top. The glass is cracked, but usable.
  19. A decorative dagger sheath, with silver inlays, and spiral patterns imprinted into the leather.
  20. A decorative longsword scabbard, dyed blue with a crisscrossing lattice of gold thread binding it.
  21. A single tile, clearly meant to be one of many. It depicts a castle tower, with a guard standing on it. The side of a tree is also visible. The art is superb.
  22. A stack of decorative tiles, decorated with swirling blue patterns. A few are cracked, but most are in perfect condition.
  23. An oversized, ornamental key made of tin. Clearly meant as a trophy, rather than as a functional key.
  24. A steel chamberpot. It has been embossed to look like the head of some villainous person or other in caricature. It’s unlikely you’d be able to find anyone who was familiar with the person depicted, and it’s probably the result of some personal grudge.
  25. A lyre, carved with small depictions of birds along the left side of it.
  26. A birdcage of brass wire, twisted to look similar to wood. An occasional brass leaf protrudes from the wire.
  27. A cross made of several woods, which have been polished and pressed together.
  28. A marble bust of Virgil.
  29. A woodcarving of a bear with a sword in its mouth. Meant to hang on a wall.
  30. A distinct warbanner, colored green with two strikes of yellow and one of black. This is one of many once used by a famous army of conquest, which many of the player’s grandparents likely fought with, or against.
  31. A 1′ by 8″ portrait of a woman, perhaps a merchant’s wife. It is painted with skill, but the subject is of no great significance.
  32. A bronze elephant, raising its trunk into the air. It is hollow, and made with no great skill, but still attractive.
  33. A clay circle inlaid with a variety of smooth stones. The stones form a simple spiral, with larger stones towards the center. The item has no obvious function.
  34. A ceramic pitcher, painted tan and brown, and adorned with a simple painting depicting the coronation of a king.
  35. A wooden statuette of a ram, about 1.5′ long. It’s light weight, and painted to more closely resemble the animal.
  36. A single arm, broken off of a lovely chandelier. Brass, plated with gold, decorated with a dangling chain of crystal from the tip.
  37. An artist’s sketchbook. The artist is signed “H.G.,” and doesn’t conform to any widely known style. But some of the pieces are quite good.
  38. A parish bible, complete with painted scenes, fancy lettering, and gilded pages.
  39. An unpublished Hymn, written in the handwriting of a moderately well known composer of hymns from 60 years ago.
  40. A lost manuscript written by Catherine Parr, titled “The Lamentations of a Gleeful Sinner.” Apparently an early draft of her later published work.
  41. An ancient game. There’s a block of wood with six peg holes in a circle, one peg carved from ivory, and four dice, each of which is painted with a skull on a single side. Evidently there are some missing pieces.
  42. A lantern with small paintings of birds on the glass. When lit, these birds appear as shadows on the walls.
  43. A recipe for preparing halibut with cabbage, sugar, and pigs feet. A note, scrawled at the bottom like a signature, reads “Fit for a king!”
  44. A bronze sphere of exceeding smoothness. It is remarkable in just how perfectly spherical it is.
  45. A leather scroll, on which is printed an ancient formulation of a mathematical proof. A proof which was lost, and only rediscovered a dozen or so years prior to now.
  46. A leather satchel with gold-colored silk inlays, a silver tie cord, and an intricate braid pattern pyrographed around the outside.
  47. A marble head. The neck is jagged, and was clearly broken off of a larger statue. Knowledgeable players may recognize the head as being a depiction of a man whose memory was banned 150 years ago. While the law is still technically on the books, no one takes it seriously anymore.
  48. A richly appointed pair of trousers. Dyed black, with a pair of gold braided cords down the right leg, and a single red braided cord down the left leg.
  49. A neck chain with thick, heavy links. Mounted on the chain is a large cross of polished mahogany.
  50. A hanging wooden sign for the Cobbler’s Knee Pub, stolen long ago from the establishment where an infamous assassination took place, setting off a decade long war.
  51. A refracted glass cylinder with small wooden birds and cotton clouds within it. As you walk around it, the refraction of the glass make it appear to contain gently drifting clouds.
  52. A belt buckle depicting a cheerful dog. The belt coming through the buckle would look like the dog’s tongue.
  53. A pair of ceramic hands mounted to a base. Between the fingers is a silver thread, held in an elaborate string-figure pattern.
  54. A chunk of marble from what was once a beautiful statue. It depicts a hand grasping some piece of flesh. The way the fingers indent the flesh shows exceedingly superb craftsmanship.
  55. A housecat-sized statue of an ant, made from tin. The statue is mounted on a cedar base, and has pearls for eyes.
  56. A key, the handle of which depicts a blacksmith swinging two hammers. The shaft and teeth of the key depict the haft and head of the hammers.
  57. A censer shaped to resemble a funeral pyre. The ‘body’ can be raised to fill the container with incense, and the smoke rises from slats between the ‘wood’.
  58. A small collection of 2d6 pewter figures of knights in armor, shown  in different battle postures.
  59. A glass bottle with a tiny cottage built inside of it. There is dirt, and fake grass. The cottage is simple, of the sort that people lived in a few hundred years ago.
  60. A bit of silver shaped to look exactly like an acorn. Exactly.
  61. A fragment of a tablet. Something is written on it in a pictograph language. The language is known, but has never yet been translated.
  62. A coin purse filled with false teeth. There are ivory, wood, steel, silver, and gold teeth. Several of each.
  63. A ceramic statue of a horse, about 4′ tall. It is crudely shaped, limited by the artistic expertise of an earlier era, but that history lends it a sense of gravitas.
  64. A fine box with a silver clasp and velvet lining. The box contains a crystal inkwell, a small knife meant for cutting quills, and a small book detailing the best way to pick and to cut quills.
  65. The nameplate of a ship. Players with any knowledge of history may recognize the ship’s name as being among 77 that were sunk during a great battle some 25 years ago.
  66. A simple brick mounted on a plaque. The plate indicates that this brick was once part of a very famous building, demolished some 43 years ago.
  67. A sword, rusted into complete uselessness. Notably, the design of the sword is one that has not been common for some 500+ years. Despite it’s condition, it is a valuable antique.
  68. A wooden box filled with carefully organized tools of good quality–drills, a hammer, files, and the like. These are a set of carpenter’s tools for a true craftsman. The sort of set that would be purchased once, and used throughout their whole lives, then be passed on to their children.
  69. A ceramic teapot of great delicacy, with a meadow scene painted on the side of it.
  70. A clay tablet with the cycles of the moon etched into it. Beneath that is a depiction of a lunar calendar plotted out for several hundred years. The last year plotted was 18 years prior.
  71. A glasswork lightning bolt, tinted a metallic sort of yellow. The bolt is fused to a clear, flat base, also made of glass.
  72. A chamber pot with a primitive depiction of pooping kings all around the outside of it.
  73. A steel bell embossed with images of clumsy stupid servants running around, failing to perform their duties competently.
  74. A milking stool of unusual quality. It has a padded seat, gold tassels, and ornately carved legs resembling praying cows.
  75. A birdcage of delicate reeds, arranged with perfection.
  76. A quilt large enough to cover any bed the players have ever seen three times over. Each patch is completely unique, and depicts some scene from rural life.
  77. A heavy steel lock. In inscription, in Latin, warns thieves to stay away or be struck down by Mars.
  78. A crude fasces. Several of the rods are cracked at the base, but it is otherwise in good condition.
  79. A blue Mitre, with knee-length tassels dangling from either side, and an embroidered white sun on the front.
  80. A single chess pawn. It obviously comes from what would have been an amazingly ornate chess set. Even this single small piece is crafted in bronze, affixed with a wireframe soldier on one side, and capped with a large pearl.
  81. A pair of manacles ill-suited to restraint. The links are loops of silk, and the cuffs themselves are polished wood, padded with cloth on the inside, and closed with leather straps.
  82. A roll of cloth containing a collection of 33 stone knives. The knives range from apparently very old and dull, to relatively recent and sharp.
  83. A phallus of leather and clay, with a wooden core. Stitched to perfection.
  84. An arrow of red, with peacock-feather fetching, and a heart-shaped ruby tip. Obviously non-functional.
  85. A large glass jug, sealed with a cork. Within is a functioning miniature biome, complete with dirt, plants, and a moisture cycle.
  86. A cylindrical steel container, shaped like a tiny angry man. The top of his head can be pulled off to open the container.
  87. A paintbrush with a jade handle, encircled with a braid pattern. The bristles are horse hair.
  88. A life-size statue of a woman, which appears to be made of stone. It’s crudely done, but notable in that it is remarkably light. Perhaps enchanted in some way, or made of some unknown material. It can easily be carried by a single person, though it is still oversize and awkward to hold.
  89. A handwritten & illustrated book describing some 350 fictional monsters. The disturbed ravings of a madman, but none the less an item of intense curiosity to the right buyer.
  90. A dogwhistle shaped like a running dog,
  91. A false nose, made of ivory, and held to the face by two leather straps that go around behind the head.
  92. A barometer, along with a leather-bound book written by an unknown German woman who experimented extensively with the strange device she inadvertently invented.
  93. A taxidermy mouse with tiny diamonds for eyes.
  94. A freestanding suit of plate armor, 3′ tall, with human proportions.
  95. A set of table silverware. Each spoon, fork, and knife has a tiny human face carved into the pommel. Each face is unique, and they display a range of emotions.
  96. A Grecian wine bowl, with pornographic images at the bottom. When you tilt the bowl back to drink, you also get to see dicks and tits!
  97.  A reproduction of a famous piece of art. It’s not really convincing enough to fool any but the completely uncultured.
  98. A map made by an ancient people of a now well-populated area. The map is crude, but has historical value.
  99. A sadomasochistic erotic novel written by Isabella of Castile
  100. A star chart on a roll of leather. Clearly made by a people who did not need to use leather, but chose to for ceremonial reasons.

Deadly Dungeons 16: Gold Egg Lure

This natural chamber contains several wide, shallow pits. Perhaps 1ft deep and between 6 and 15ft across. Each pit holds several eggs of brilliant, sparkling gold. Each egg has a beautiful swirling pattern, and some even have speckles which appear to be tiny pearls. The beauty of these artifacts is all the more profound because they do not appear to be a work of craft, but a work of nature. The intricate details of each entirely unique egg could be studied for hours.

The empty space in each pit is filled with a dark, foul-smelling mash of organic material. This is packed around the eggs, holding them upright. No egg is closer than 1ft from any edge of the pit, or any other egg in the pit. It is a simple matter to identify the mash as the rotting meat of dead creature. Anyone with basic knowledge of nature will be able to deduce that this was probably done to insulate the eggs before they hatch, and provide food for whatever young emerge from them after. A close, detailed inspection of the mash will reveal that while most of it is of unrecognizable origin, there are several distinct humanoid parts included in the mash, such as fingers.

Also within this room are several small alcoves. The entrances to these alcoves are placed above eye level, between 7 and 10 feet off the ground. They are small, and well hidden amongst the natural flow of the stone walls. They will not be noticed unless the players specifically declare that they are looking at higher areas of the cavern wall with their torches. Simply walking the perimeter of the room would be insufficient.

Within these alcoves rest the parents of the eggs. Between 3 and 8 of them. The specific manner of this creature is left to GM discretion, as this is not a Merciless Monsters post. However, for my purposes, I chose a special breed of giant spider with the following attributes in addition to the basic ones:

  • Spins web which is razor sharp, rather than sticky. It prefers to consume chunks of bleeding meat, rather than drain its victim’s innards.
  • Mandibles which become superheated and can easily smelt metal or stone. This is both how it escapes from a golden egg in its youth, and how it creates this specific environment from sheer stone when it is time to mate.
  • Preys particularly on humanoid species.
  • Evolved eggs which avaricious humans would find too tempting not to try and steal.

Whatever creature is used, some sign of its presence should exist. Perhaps tangled strands of razorweb bunched up at the door, which a perceptive player might notice glinting in the torchlight.

While characters are distracted by the eggs, the creatures will move in to kill them. In the example of the razorweb spiders, they will spin a web across the cavern’s only exit, causing anyone who leaves to fall into bloody chunks. If the players set a watch while examining the eggs, that watch should notice the spider’s efforts and alert the rest of the party. Unless this or other precautions are taken, however, it is likely that at least one player will die here. Bear that in mind before making use of this room.