Session 64 – Trashalanche

Dramatis Personae
+Frotz Self as Varouj
+Ronnie Whelan as Ronnina
+Moreven Brushwood as The Four Gobbos

1,000,000cc, paid for giving Edward Sallow a causus beli against the Dukes of the Dome.

Prior to dividing the money up, the party paid the 91,750 required to pay back Team Gopher for their lost materials.

The remaining 908,250 was divided evenly between Ronnina, Varouj, and Don Harper of Mars. Each received 302,750 cc & xp.

Political Fallout

Over the course of January-March 2518, Edward Sallow and his army of Redstone Lords push deep into Dukes of the Dome territory, which steadily gives way under the onslaught. The push focuses mostly Domeside, and the Dukes lose a huge swath of territory before Edward Sallow is recalled by the Redstone Lord Senate.

Despite Sallow’s excellent justifications for his attack, they have trumped up a slew of charges against him, including outright accusing him of fabricating an excuse for war. It’s unclear if they have any actual evidence for this, or if it’s merely a suspicion. Regardless, Edward Sallow refuses to answer these charges. Instead, he negotiated a peace with the Dukes, and has turned his armies against the senate. The Redstone Lords are now embroiled in a civil war.

The Dukes of the Dome have decided to use their fortuitous respite to root out traitors from their own midst. One of Dayvo allies brought charges against Bacob for his part in starting the war. He denied the charges, but the evidence was compelling, and justice was swiftly carried out. Through subtle means, Dayvo ended up owning most of Bacob’s former holdings.

The Dukes of the Dome, given respite from their own conflict with the Lords,


The Gobbos managed to get funding from the rest of the party to found an Orphanage in Trumpquatia.

Don Harper’s Fun Zone Front of House had its Yearly Return in February. It did NOT go bankrupt, and grew by 8%, paying out 1,600 cc.

Gobbo Orphanage
Level 1 – On any given month, 1 new hireling can be recruited from the Orphans. Loyalty starts at 4.
Level 2 – Hirelings recruited from the Orphanage begin at level 2.
Level 3 – Hirelings recruited from the Orphanage begin at level 3.

A number of alchemical recipes were discussed during this session:

A Potion of Perfect Aim requires 6 essences.
A Potion of Feelin’ Fine (which makes the imbiber unaware of the damage they’re taking) requires 1 essence.
A Potion of Dinosaur requires 10 essences.
A potion of Farty Flight requires 5 essences.
A potion of Underwater/Vaccuum breathing requires 3 essences.
A Hardstare Potion requries 5 essences.
A potion which raises a random skill temporarily to 6-in-6 requires 2 essences.

Haven Turn
Due to the length of this adventure, everyone gets 3 Haven Turns.

Umquat 1: Training Torture up to Expert (Month 4 of 5)
Umquat 2: Training Torture up to Expert (Month 5 of 5) Congratulations! Your Torture skill is now 4-in-6.
Umquat 3: ???

Varouj 1: Weight Training. (+1 to str), (month 2 of 3)
Varouj 2: Weight Training. (+1 to str), (month 3 of 3) Congratulations! Your strength increases by 1!
Varouj 3: Begins training Alchemy to Expert (4-in-6)(Month 1 of 5)

Varouj also spends time with Helen, getting to know her a little better.

Ronnina 1: Trains Pilot skill up to 1-in-6 (Month 1 of 1)
Ronnina 2: Trains Pilot skill up to 2-in-6 (Month 1 of 2)
Ronnina 3: Trains Pilot skill up to 2-in-6 (Month 2 of 2)

Don Harper 1: ???
Don Harper 2: ???
Don Harper 3: ???

Don Harper’s Fun Zone Front of House had its Yearly Return in February. It did NOT go bankrupt, and grew by 8%, paying out 1,600 cc.

NPC Interactions
Busker Whose Concertina Was Wrecked by Don Harper – Neither he, nor the party, recognized one another.

Petitioners for Umquat – Wanted help from the great ruler of Trumpquatia

Group of mutants for the hospital, including SuzieQ

Dayvo – Was assisted by Varouj in overcoming his rival, Bacob.

Bacob – Was judged, and stripped of his rank and titles.

Helen – Varouj spent some time with her.

Highlights Recap

With all their plans set into motion, it was time for the party to escape Redstone Lord territory before the war they were attempting to start broke out, and they got caught in the midst of it. They opted to first travel North, away from the wall and into more established Redstone Lord territory. That way, they wouldn’t have to deal with the boarder crossing guards.

They briefly passed by a busker singing really terrible songs, accompanied by a battered concertina. The gobbos gave him a bug, he acted very friendly about it, and Ronnina rewarded him with 3 credits.

Further along, the party were cutting their way through a sort of improvised landfill, and were accosted by a floating spherical creature which called itself GLOGNAR. It insisted they fill out the proper forms before moving through its territory. The party made a token effort at doing this, filling out some of the forms in a stack of random forms the creature had collected. (Ronnina filled out an application to work at Burger Princess, Varouj applied for a boat loan, etc). GLOGNAR then dropped the applications into a cardboard box labelled “IN,” and told the party to wait 2-6 weeks for a reply.

The party tried to chat with GLOGNAR, who bemoaned the sad state of bureaucracy in the post apocalypse. They offered to help him with his paperwork, but he adamantly refused to allow it. So Varouj had Robot Monster attempt a stun beam, which failed. Stealth was checked to see if the Stun Beam would be noticed or not, and Stealth also failed. GLOGNAR was mad.

With a wave of one of this many willowy hand-tendrils, he caused a heap of trash to cascade down on the party, enveloping them in a trashalanche, which dealt 2d6 damage to everyone, and caused most of them to be buried in trash. Fortunately for the party, Ronnina’s magic missiles proved overwhelming for the trash beholder, and before it was able to take a second action, GLOGNAR was no more.

The party’s journey was mostly safe after that. At one point they were mobbed by a group of Fighting Mongoose peasants, but these only seemed to be looking for Umquat (+Linlin Kins). They begged for various things: food, money, jobs, a place to live, protection from their enemies, and an end to immigration. The party took a page from GLOGNAR’s book, and told them to fill out a formal petition, and deliver it to the gates of Trumpquatia for Mertyl to process. Many of them complained that they couldn’t write, but Varouj assured them it was okay to have someone else write their application for them.

The party also passed by another group of Fighting Mongoose who were heading south towards Rulers Beneath the Black territory, but decided just to let the other group alone. Nobody wants to be a Police Cop.

Finally, just as they were about to reach home, they encountered a group of mutants on their way to the Mutant Hospital, including a little girl named SuzieQ who had so many eyes that she had a hard time breathing. The party traveled with them the rest of the way home, while the Gobbos played with all the mutant children.

Once home, Varouj made a point of sending a message to his friend Dayvos in Dukes of the Dome territory, letting him know a little bit about the fight that was about to go down, and that the party had framed Dayvos’ rival Bacob for the mess.

So ended January 2518.

Thoughts and theories on tabletop games.