Category Archives: Usable Game Material

d100 Materials your Post-Apocalyptic Armor is Made From

Armor made from soda can tabsFor each piece of armor found, roll once or twice on the table to determine what materials it’s made from. Everything on this list is super realistic. If you find something you think is unrealistic, it’s just because you don’t understand something that I do understand. Because I am a very smart boy.

  1. Street signs, such as “Stop,” “Yield,” or “Children at Play.”
  2. Car body pieces, like the hood, doors, or bumper.
  3. Rubber tires.
  4. Sheet metal
  5. Leather, perhaps in the form of an old world jacket, or something tanned in the post apocalypse. In the case of the latter, it may be human leather.
  6. Chain link fence.
  7. Cookware, like pots, pans, or baking sheets.
  8. Layered silverware or cutlery
  9. Plywood, probably from some old Ikea furniture.
  10. Books of any sort. Paperbacks or magazines work just as well as hardbacks or coffee table books. Don’t underestimate the stopping force of layered paper!
  11. A weave of cables and wiring.
  12. Folded duct tape.
  13. Regular old-world clothing, like a T-shirt, but stacked in layer upon layer upon layer until it’s formidable armament.
  14. Protective sports equipment, like football shoulder pads, hockey goalie leg pads, or a BMX biker’s helmet.
  15. Bones from various creatures, animals, beasts, and humans.
  16. The carapace of a giant, mutated insect.
  17. Soles from old shoes.
  18. Old plumbing pipes, made of metal or PVC.
  19. Carpeting torn up from a floor, possibly layered to make it thicker.
  20. Cut-up metal cans, like you would use for paint or oil, or Campbell’s soup. 
  21. Children’s plastic toy armor.
  22. Ludicrous cosplayer armor, which can be made mostly functional if you cut off all the extraneous spikes.
  23. Some piece of medieval reenactor armor. It’s probably not actually made of metal, or if so, it’s probably not made terribly well.
  24. Real medieval armor. Before the apocalypse, this would have been a valuable historical artifact.
  25. Police riot gear, well preserved from the per-apocalypse.
  26. Chain link made from belt-buckles.
  27. An old robot chasis that a human can squeeze themselves inside of.
  28. Animal cages.
  29. A lifejacket
  30. Old AOL disks, pinned together.
  31. Motorcycle safety gear.
  32. Safety gear from a construction site, like a hard hat, gloves, or reflective vest.
  33. Welder gear, either the mask, or the heavy apron.
  34. One of those lead-lined aprons dentists put on people when they X-Ray them.
  35. Firefighter PPE.
  36. Wicker, probably taken from some old patio furniture.
  37. Soft, thick pads, like pillows, couch cushions, or even just a comforter.
  38. License plates
  39. Chainmail made from carabiners
  40. Old, discarded plaster casts, like the ones used to keep a bone straight while it sets.
  41. A woven mesh of nylon rope.
  42. Old BDSM fetish gear. Some of that shit is fuckin’ sturdy, and you’re not in any position to be picky.
  43. A Halloween costume.
  44. Old bullet casings, strapped together in rows.
  45. Video game cartridges, pinned together.
  46. A trash can.
  47. Hair from humans or horses, woven into thick sheets.
  48. The skins of old deflated sports balls, like basketballs and footballs.
  49. A satellite dish.
  50. Soda can tabs. That’s what the armor worn by the woman in the image above is made from.
  51. Twigs, strapped into rows.
  52. Three ring binders.
  53. Tin cans.
  54. A hollowed out part of a taxidermied animal.
  55. LEGO bricks. Particularly some of the large flat plates.
  56. The boards from board games.
  57. Trading cards of various types, from baseball to magic the gathering.
  58. Nerf.
  59. Stuffed animals.
  60. Plastic plants, such as fake ferns.
  61. Computer parts, like circuit boards, keyboards, chassis, and CRT monitor housings.
  62. Food containers from the world before. Stuff like cereal boxes, or chip bags, layered together.
  63. Rulers and yard sticks, held together with pins.
  64. Window blinds.
  65. Clothes hangars, interlocked with each other.
  66. Silicone sex toys: dildos, butt plugs, vibrators…
  67. D&D 3rd edition splat books.
  68. Clip boards.
  69. The backboard from a basketball hoop.
  70. Cardboard boxes.
  71. Cleaning gear: rubber gloves, dustpans, or the heads from brooms and mops.
  72. A piece of some kind of experimental body armor from the pre-apocalypse. It looks like it was made by a doomsday prepper with more money than sense.
  73. Broken bits off of plastic shopping carts.
  74. One of those layered cardboard scratchers they make for cats.
  75. Bicycle parts, like the wheels, handlebars, or chain.
  76. Wine cork lamellar.
  77. Library card lamellar. (Also “club cards” from big box stores, or credit cards).
  78. Safety glass, probably pulled out of a door from a school.
  79. Matchbox cars.
  80. An old folding table.
  81. Giant letters that used to form the name of some long-forgotten business.
  82. Mail made from fidget spinners.
  83. Smartphone cases.
  84. Old metal tonka toys.
  85. Roofing shingles.
  86. Horse shoes.
  87. Hula hoops and jump ropes.
  88. Discarded plastic bottles.
  89. Circular saw blades.
  90. Dozens and dozens of “unbreakable” combs.
  91. Cheap costume jewelry: rings and bracelets interlocked into mail, draped bundles of necklace chains, and so on.
  92. Cardboard tubes, like the ones from toilet paper, paper towels, and wrapping paper.
  93. Vinyl house siding.
  94. Steel medical brace.
  95. Shovel heads.
  96. Fan blades
  97. Cutting boards.
  98. Dumb, cheap, fantasy weapons. They’re so ridiculous that nobody can actually use them as weapons, so they’re trying to put them to use as armor.
  99. A dartboard.
  100. Something crazy valuable that the “armor smith” apparently didn’t realize was valuable. Like a working gameboy, a floppy disk with secret information on it, or a bit of wood with a treasure map singed into it.

The Cozy Catacombs: A Demonstration of Flux Space

Paris CatacombsA few weeks back, I wrote up an idea that I called Flux Space, which is basically a method for randomizing segments of a dungeon. It helps dungeons to feel more like vast environments, and makes it a little easier to organize your notes.

In the thread about Flux Space on google+, Aaron Griffin asked me if I would post an example. So that’s what I’m doing. The Cozy Catacombs are a small example–just 3 locations and 3 fluxes arranged in a triangle. It’s pretty much the bare minimum size for something like this, but I think it gets across the idea pretty well, and there’s enough here for at least one or two game sessions if you want to try it out.

The Cozy Catacombs

Flux Space DiagramThe city of Sarip is old. Its been inhabited since pre-history, and through the millennia has always lent authority to whomever lived there. Empires, religions, and societies may pass, but Sarip remains. The Immortal City.

Beneath Sarip is a sprawling network of catacombs. Countless generations of bones are stacked along the walls so thick the stonework isn’t visible between them. The catacombs themselves have been out of use for hundreds of years now, at least officially. They’re a popular retreat for anyone not welcome in the city above, with plenty of space to live and work rent free, so long as you don’t get lost.

Area 1: Entrance

Flux Space One1. At the bottom of the stairs is a bronze plaque mounted on a plinth. It’s a recent addition, put up by city officials, warning people to stay out of the catacombs, lest they become lost.

The floor is littered with empty booze bottles and scraps of trash.

2. A small group of homeless folks have set up a camp here, around an old fountain they use as a urinal. One of them has scurvy, and will soon die from it.

3. A group of fresh corpses. They’ve been flayed, and their bones taken. From the scattered equipment, it looks like they weren’t homeless. Probably here hoping to plunder some treasure. Bloody, boney footprints trail off to the south, towards Flux B.

4. A larger group of homeless folks, cooking a stolen chicken on a spit. There are some children running around and playing loudly. Among the group is a well dressed young man, about 20 years of age. He seems to be having fun, slumming it down here, seeing how the other half live.

5. A group of 7 teenage girls. They’ve all got dirty faces, and kitchen knives. They’re arguing about how they should divide the 6 silver coins they found.

Area 2: Necrotic Praxeum

Flux Space Two1. Long benches are arranged next to one another in this room, with rows of zombies standing on either side, polishing old bones to a pristine white sheen. Other zombies with carts move up and down between the tables, handing out dirty bones, and taking the clean ones.

2. A few shelves, and a collection of tomes detailing the history and practice of necromancy. The librarian is a wizened old man named Bu’zaldu. It’s not clear whether he’s undead, or just very very old. He teases the students here with cryptic hints, and there’s a rumor that if you can prove which one he is, he’ll teach you a spell even the headmistress doesn’t know.

3. 12 beds, stacked 3 high, where students are allowed to rest between lessons. There’s very little downtime here, and even less privacy.

4. A well stocked alchemical laboratory, with jars all along the walls containing a variety of exotic items. In the middle of the room is a student who has fallen asleep in their chair, next to a solution that is slowly dribbling into a vial. It’s just about full now. If thrown, this concoction will explode, dealing 3d6 damage, and instantly transforming anyone killed by it into a zombie under the command of the thrower.

5. Most of the students are congregated here. There are piles of polished bones in front of each student, while the school’s headmistress walks around the room, describing the proper method of raising a skeleton from the dead. Students work in pairs to raise each one, which the Headmistress then comes over to inspect. If she approves of it, she’ll congratulate the students, give them some pointers on refining their technique, and give the skeleton some task to perform. If she does not approve, she’ll berate the students, and send their skeleton walking down the path of shame (into Flux C.

She only approves of roughly 1 in every 5 skeletons.

6. The office and living space of the head mistress. Skulls and gargoyles are everywhere you look. There’s a bed, a desk, and a rack for punishing students who perform poorly. On the desk is a stack of wax-sealed letters, tied with a ribbon, waiting to be delivered. If opened, they all contain a list of students who are doing poorly, as well as a brief description of each one’s qualities. The letters are addressed to various peoples: inquisitors, slavers, and a cyclops named “Gorkk Manmuncher.” The implication of each letter is clear: I don’t really want these kids anymore, so I’ll happily part with them for a good price.

Area 3: Skeleton Vanguard

Flux Space Three1. An old chapel, with a statue of St Stephen. The pews have been stacked into a circle, which serves as an impromptu fence for a group of skeletons. The skeletons wander around without any apparent purpose, bumping in to one another, falling down, and losing body parts. Whoever raised these obviously did a terrible job of it.

2. Havord, the leader of the skeleton vanguard, is conferring with five of his most intelligent comrades. They’re looking over crude maps they’ve been able to make of the dungeon, and arguing about where they should expand to.The two Flux spaces would be difficult to defend. But Area 1 would expose them to detection from the outside world, and Area 2 would cut off their supply of incoming skeletons. It’s a serious problem, and the argument is getting heated.

Havord himself has a skull 4 times larger than a normal human skull. He is otherwise a normal skeleton.

3. A classroom where a trio of intelligent skeletons try to teach some of the dumb reject skeletons how to think, and perform simple tasks. The program is effective, but frustrating. The curriculum is similar to what you might see in a kindergarden class, but with a lot more discussion of killing the living.

4. A storage room where the skeleton vanguard keeps their weapons, and a bunch of animated skeletons folded into boxes because there’s not enough room for them to move about more comfortably.

5. A 24 hour skeleton dance party. The best way to unwind for off duty skellos.

6. The floor of the room has been dug up in several places, and a frail weave of twigs placed across the opening to 15′ pits. The trap is painfully obvious to anyone with any intellect, but apparently it’s sufficient to trap dumb, wandering skeletons. Even now, scraping sounds carry from several of the pits, where dumb bags o’ bones are trying to claw their ways out.

Flux A.

Description: Small gargoyles and other statues punctuate the stonework. Every so often, when you look away, the bones here rearrange themselves.

Size: 3

1. 2d4 students from the Necrotic Praxeum. They’re either on their way to, or returning from, a supply run in the city above.

2. A door made of pink flesh. A supernatural darkness obscures the room beyond, refusing to allow any light to penetrate. The room beyond can only be navigated by touch. It is soft and fleshy, with a slimy mucus seeping in through the floor and walls. The room is deep, but does not seem to contain anything interesting. Each turn, there is a 1-in-4 chance that 2d20 goblins will come flooding out of this room, and out into the catacombs beyond. If the room is harmed, this flood may be prevented for a few days. If it is harmed severely, the room may be killed, and the goblins will cease to be born from it.

3. The Goblin Market, where all manner of oddities are for sale. There’s jars full of eyeballs, armors, buttplugs, and a whole shop dedicated to selling various styles of 10′ poles. (That last one is having a blowout sale. They’re overstocked). No violence is allowed at the Goblin Market.

4. 2d6 + 4 goblins, which have just finished killing a group of three human adventurers. The goblins are in the midst of organizing the adventurer’s equipment, and slicing off meat from the adventurer’s bodies.

5. A randomly determined member of the party trips. They flail their hands, and grab on to a leg bone that’s sticking out from the wall of the catacombs. Unexpectedly, it turns down, as though it were a lever, and a secret door swings open. Beyond is a room with a plinth in it, and a skeleton wearing golden armor.

The armor is incredibly valuable, but whomever takes it from this place is cursed. Any building they sleep in has a 1-in-6 chance of catching fire in the night.

6. A map to a Vampire’s lair is sketched onto the wall. Next to it are the words “PLEASE KILL ME.”

Flux B.

Description: A green ooze seeps from between the stacked bones, dribbling onto the floor and disappearing into the cracks. Many of the rooms contain abandoned camps. Apparently this area was once more heavily settled by homeless people, which have since left for whatever reason.

Size: 4

1. 2d6 + 5 highly capable troops of the Skeletal Vanguard. One of them is working on a map of the area, while the others are holding weapons at the ready to kill any meat-people they bump into.

2. A little shop, built into an alcove in the wall. It has a bar, some stools, and a sign which reads Durza’s Drugporium! Durza herself is a squat, fat old woman. She’s coy about how she survives down here, and she sells the best drugs you’re ever likely to get your hands on, at cut rate prices.

3. A fountain swarming with fairies, all of whom are men. They’ll offer to cure anyone who is injured, only revealing after the fact that they require blowjobs in return. And you’ve gotta swallow, ‘cuz that’s the part that will heal your wounds. To add insult to injury, their vaunted curative abilities amount to a single hit point of restoration.

4. A finely ornamented Victorian parlor, with all the fashionable amenities. There’s a fire going in the fireplace, fresh biscuits on a tray, and several comfortable looking lounge chairs arranged in a conversation circle.

The chairs are alive, and will attempt to eat anyone who sits in them.

5. 2d4 + 2 goblins fighting with 2d4 + 2 skeletons.

6. A very obvious lever, built into the floor. There’s writing on the handle which reads “Pull for treasure!” If pulled, nothing happens.

Flux C.

Description: Apparently there’s an underground river running nearby, because there are fountains everywhere, pumping cool clean water, despite the fact that none of this has been maintained in centuries.

Size: 3

1. 1d4 skeletons who are wandering away from the Necrotic Praxeum. They’re dumb, and clumsy, but do have basic life-destroying instincts, and will try to attack any living creatures they encounter.

2. 2d6 + 6 soldiers of the Skeleton Vanguard. One is mapping, while the rest seek out dumb skeletons to recruit, and fleshlings to kill.

3. If the players found and pulled the lever in Flux B.6, they will a door here, with a plaque on it that reads: “Congratulations, lever puller!” Within is a chest containing two bags, each olding 500 silver pieces each. If its been more than a day since the players pulled the lever, the chest may already have been looted. If the players haven’t pulled the lever at all, there won’t be any door. They’ll just have the vague sense that they’re missing out on something cool.

4. A forge, with a bellows and an anvil. The air his hot, and rings with the blows of hammer against metal. Weapons of war are being forged here by…snakes. Snakes, holding hammers in their mouths, and slithering around with buckets of water on their backs. Thousands of them are here, working together. If the players bother them, they will scatter into little holes in the wall, and wait for the players to leave.

5.Garrison Renuar, a 325 year old Vampire, sitting on the edge of his coffin with his head in his hands. Garrison wants to die. Life is dull, and he doesn’t really like killing people. However, the vampire which birthed him is still alive, and he is incapable of killing himself of his own free will without permission from his ‘parent.’ He will beg anyone who meets him to try and kill him, but is obligated to fight his best to stay alive.

6. A nearby fungus growing into the corpse of a wizard has been mutating out of control for awhile now. Recently (as in, last week), it began to produce a race of mushroom people: squat, 2′ high mushrooms with eyes, mouths, and feet. These new creatures don’t really know what to do with themselves. They haven’t developed a language or a society yet, though they are intelligent enough to do so. For now, they’re just following their fungus instincts, but those aren’t really taking advantage of their new mobility and intellect.

How I Construct Dragons

Erol Otus DragonLast week, I intended to write an explanation of how I run dragons in my games. I started the post with a little preamble about what I think the current state of dragons is, and what I don’t like about it. Somewhere around the 900 word mark, I realized my preamble had become an impassioned essay all its own. So I opted to split the post into two parts: the angry rant, and the sober rules discussion.

Welcome to the boring half of that split.

Most encounter tables I use have 2d6 possible encounters on them. On on every one of those tables, a result of 2 means the party has encountered a dragon. Because dragons are like any other kind of vermin: they can survive just about everywhere, and you’re never really going to get rid of them entirely.

The formula for a dragon has 8 parts. There’s description, hoard, toll, statline, breath, spells, minions, and specials.

The Description is a few sentences (3 or 4 max) which can be read at the table to give the referee a snapshot of who and what this dragon is. Usually I try to include a little physical description, and some details about personality.

For physical descriptions, I assume anyone reading has a basic sense of what a dragon looks like, so I limit myself to describing deviations from that norm. More relevant than appearance is personality. What drives this dragon? Do they have a particular love, hate, or desire? Give the referee something to work from while the dragon is conversing with the PCs.

(I say “the referee” as if anybody but me has read these. I do plan to publish my dragons someday, but so far they’re just my personal game aides).

As a sample, here’s the description for Grogund the Mammal:

Shaggy grey fur, a long snout, and deer antlers. She is doubly cruel to humans to mask her own insecurities about being a non-reptilian dragon.

Each dragon’s Hoard is unique. They’re not all sitting on heaps of gold. Why should they? What special significance should gold have to them? It’s not like they’re ever going to spend it, or that they need it to survive. The way dragons assign value to objects is based on a logic completely removed from human economics. Indeed, what a dragon values may seem like trash to us.

Of course, like any narcissist, dragons seek the adoration of others. Not just for their raw power, but for their fine taste. So, often, dragons do hoard objects others would consider to be of great value. But even then, it’s not necessarily going to be gold. Grogund, for example, hoards fine rugs. She rests upon a nice soft heap, and has plenty of minions meticulously cleaning her rugs day and night to keep them in beautiful condition.

The Toll of dragon is the cost of having a nonviolent encounter with them. They expect tribute, and will punish anyone who thinks themselves too good to offer it. Generally speaking, a toll will be something the dragon could add to its hoard. So, for Grogund, anyone who meets her must offer a rug, or meet their doom.

It is a quirk of the draconic psyche that that must accept an appropriate toll if it is offered. A mildewed old bathroom rug would be an insult to Grogund, but she would accept it none the less, and allow those who offered it to pass her unmolested. Of course, insulting a dragon may be fun, but it carries its own consequences.

Remember, that if a dragon leaps out in a surprise attack, you may not have time to offer them a toll before they eat you.

Note also that paying a dragon’s toll only entitles a person to turn around and walk away. If the dragon is pleased with the toll, they may be willing to converse, but they will still spring to attack if the toll payer offers any insult or encroachment.

The Statline for dragons is just a basic statline. Armor Rating, Movement, Hit Dice, Attack, and Morale. Normally I wouldn’t bother talking about this part too much, because it’s pretty boring and you already know how to do it. But, for dragons, I do have a very particular set of guidelines for how I put the basic stats together.

Armor Rating tends towards the mid-to-high end. Between 15 and 19 most of the time. Morale tends towards the low end, with 5-8 being average. Dragons are tough to hurt, but cowardly if they feel at all disadvantaged.

Weaker dragons will have around 7 Hit Dice, with the average being around 10 or 11, and tougher dragons having 16 or 17. Of course, there’s no reason you can’t throw together some 30hd dragons for higher level players, but there’s also value in letting players outpace dragons if they reach such loftily high levels. Dragons being scary should not be an inviolate, sacrosanct part of the game. If the players become badass enough, it’s okay for dragons to become less threatening. They can be replaced by other horrors.

ProJared Final Fantasy 1 NES 4 Four FrostD IceD Dragon

For Movement, I just pull directly from AD&D. Dragons are typically fairly slow on the ground, with a speed of 90′ (30′). Of course, they often have flying, or some other type of unusual movement speed (swimming, burrowing, climbing, etc) with which they are much faster. 240′ (80′) is my baseline for their second type of movment.

The two types of movement at different speeds are useful. On the one hand it makes it much easier for players to flee when the dragon is stuck on foot. Most adventurers are going to be able to outrun a dragon in the corridors of a dungeon. However, if the players make the mistake of going into an open area, where the dragon can use its secondary movement, they’ve got no chance. You’ve gotta have mad runaway strats, son.

Finally, most dragons have 3 basic physical Attacks. Two claws that each deal a single die of damage, and a bite which deals multiple dice of damage. That’s the baseline, but there’s a lot of room for variation here. Some dragons have more than the usual number of claws, and so more attacks. Some have powerful tail swipes or horn gores that are more worthy of mention than their bite. The baseline only exists for those instances where no better ideas present themselves.

The Breath of a dragon is its signature. I try to be as creative with these as I can. I have my fair share of fire breathers, of course. To some extent, such traditions have to be maintained, so that deviations from them will continue to be notable. But most of my dragons tend to breath things like boiling oil, a flurry of angry pecking birds, or a suicidal sense of self loathing. Be as weird as you can be.

If a dragon’s breath deals damage, that damage is equal to the dragon’s current hit points. (So, the closer the dragon is to death, the less effective its breath is).

Traditionally, some dragons in D&D have Spells. I prefer to avoid any spells that deal direct damage, since their breath and claws and bite are already such reliable sources for damage. Rather, I like to give dragons spells which buff, debuff, ensnare, control, or alter the environment. Something that adds a new dimension to the threat they pose.

I should note that these days, when I’m giving a monster or an NPC spells, I typically don’t bother describing those spells’ effects beforehand. Usually I just put in a spell name, and maybe add a brief description if I have a good idea I want to remember at the table. Then, if the spell actually comes up in play, that’s when I’ll decide what the powers and limitations of the spell are.

I realize this may seem damaging to agency, and I admit that in some ways it is. But so long as the rules of the spell don’t change once they’ve been decided upon, I think it’s a fairly small sacrifice to make to prevent spells from becoming an overly burdensome part of monster creation.

Minions exist to feed a dragon’s need for adoration. Not every dragon will have them. Some are too moody or misanthropic to keep anyone around them for too long. Others, though, will revel in surrounding themselves with sycophants, slaves, and worshipers. These may perform any number of services for the dragon, but ultimately their true purpose is always to feed the dragon’s ego.

There’s no limit on what form the minions may take. Some dragons may prefer to have only one or two highly capable body-servants. Creatures who can become intimately familiar with the dragon’s habits, and respond to their desires before they’re even expressed. Others may have more extravagant preferences, dragging a cult of worshipers, or a harem of consorts behind them.

Last of all, I try to give every dragon at least one notable Special thing. These can be powers which make the dragon harder to deal with. They can be weaknesses, which make the dragon vulnerable if known. Other times, the special trait is just some incidental thing. Something unlikely to come up in play, but potentially interesting if it does.

So while one dragon’s special might be an immunity to fire, another dragon may take extra damage from fire, while a third perhaps has multiple personalities which they switch between every time they see fire. As with everything else, the sky’s the limit.

Now, generally speaking, I don’t bother paying the Joesky Tax. But last week was particularly gratuitous, and I’ve literally got hundreds of dragons written up that probably aren’t going to be published anytime soon. So here’s 5 of them, all created using the guidelines discussed in this post. Iguanamouth Hoard of Sex ToysXulamara the Serpent Slave

A mammalian dragon with a serpentine body, white fur, eight long cloven legs, and a pair of twisting horns. Fire licks from her mouth with every word she speaks. She has no wings, but a pair of flat-toothed serpents grow from her shoulders. She is simple minded, and territorial.
Hoards: Various dyes, some of which are able to do seemingly impossible things, like dye elaborate patterns directly into cloth.
Armor 19, Move 120′(40′), 9HD, 2 Snakes 2d6, Bite 3d8, Morale 7
Snake Attack: The two snakes attack by spitting acid, which has a range of 30′.
Breath: A wall of fire, 100′ long and 10′ tall. Remains in place for 24 hours before burning out.
Special: Immune to normal missiles.
Special: Xulamara is cursed to remain forever ignorant of the snakes growing from his back. If he is told about them, or even shown a reflection of them, he will deny that they exist. The snakes whisper into his ears constantly, tricking him into doing whatever they want.

Gressen the Shedded

A translucent white creature; the shed skin of another dragon somehow animated to life and intelligence. Able to move and act as her own person. Gressen was originally shed from a male dragon, but chose a female aspect for herself. She has a tendency to sarcastically goad people into attacking her. (“Go on, I’m clearly just a waif of a thing. It’ll be easy to slay me and take my treasure. Just try it!”) In truth, she is terrified of how fragile her body is.
Hoards: Spell books.
Armor 20, Move 90′(30′)/Fly 240′(80′), 4HD, 2 Claw 1d3, Bite 2d6, Morale 5
Breath:
Cone of cold.
Spells: Enbrittle Skin, Gust of Wind, Baleful Polymorph, Charm Monster, Sow Discord, Geas, Illusory Disguise, Magic Web (An invisible web that ‘catches’ spells, so they can be studied later), Detect Lies, Maze, Invisibility, Magic Armor
Special: Any wind-based attacks used against her deal double damage, and may blow her away.

Jakasset the Silver Teeth

Jakassat wears  golden rings on her talons and tail, a bejeweled necklace, and a diadem on her brow. One of these pieces of jewelry works a magical gender changing effect on her, and all the rest are worn to keep the significance of that one item a secret. Jakasset has also replaced all of her teeth with little silver daggers. She is a contemplative creature, with an unusually short temper, even for a dragon.
Hoards: Polearms of various types.
Armor 17, Move 90′(30′)/Fly 240′(80′), 8HD, 2 Claw 1d6, Bite 3d10, Morale 6
Breath: A hail of spinning knives. These remain on the ground in heaps, and can be used for about 24 hours before they rot away.
Spells: Sleep, Water From the Earth, Teleport, Stone To Mud
Minions: A murder of 6d6 crows which fly around above her, and obey her orders to the best of their crow-abilities.
Special: One of the rings on her tail protects her from all elemental based damage. Special: One of her tail rings protects her from all elemental based damage

Special: Jakasset is highly respected among dragon kind, for some unknown deed that dragons refuse to discuss with outsiders.

Arasemnin

A bluescale with 53 large white horns running down her back, from head to tail tip. Her body is slender and lithe, with muscles that twitch as if always ready to pounce. She is the daughter of Uruk’An, and was exiled from her father’s territory years ago for defying him. She spends hours of every day imagining elaborate ways of getting revenge on the old fool.
Hoards: Tapestries depicting historical events.
Armor 19, Move 90′(30′)/Fly 240′(80′), 2 Claw 1d6, Bite 3d8, Morale 6
Breath: Cone of fire.
Spells: Bear’s Strength, Sphere of Insubstantiality, Animate Object, Imbue Hatred
Special: Her horns act as grounding against spells. Each horn can absorb one spell cast against her per day. After she is killed, the horns retain their function. If cut off, they can each be used once before becoming useless.

Uruk’An

An elderly blusescale, with a cascade of soft white horns growing from his chin. Uruk’An is father to 12 other dragons–unusually prolific, even for such an elderly and distinguished patriarch. Uruk’An belives in law, and has scribed 3 tomes of law which anyone in his domains must obey, or face is wrath. Most of his laws are common sense (at least, from a dragon’s perspective), but there are some strange ones. Most notalby, there is an extensive code governing acceptable clothing for halflings, and several statues regarding the proper rate of breathing for various activities.
Hoards: Lawbooks.
Armor 20, Move 60′(20′)/Fly 210′(70′), 2 Claw 1d10, Bite 4d8, Morale 8
Breath: Cone of fire.
Spells: Wall of Spears, Detect Lies, Farsight, Dispell Illusions, Anti-Magic Field, Ring of Law, Hold Person, Dimension Door, Break Weapons, Rust, Imprison, Speak with Animals, Mend Wound, Passwall,  Shrink Person
Minions: 2d6 bluescaled lizard folk. 3 dragon whelps that each have 4 hit dice, and don’t have any breath yet.
Special: When Uruk’An dies, he will leave an egg behind, with himself inside. He will be reborn out of his own death. Even he does not know this will happen.

d100 Mercenary or Bandit Leaders

d100 Mercenary & Bandit LeadersThis d100 table was selected by my generous Patrons. If you’d like a chance to decide what d100 tables I’ll work on next, drop a dollar into my Patreon!

So, what makes these mooks more than just mooks?

  1. Killer Paul – A psychopathic serial killer, who finds this way of life a useful in providing for his needs. Always likes to take a few alive if he can, so he can ‘play’ with them. Whenever someone joins his band, Killer Paul cuts deep into his own chest, and forces the initiate to ‘suckle at the devil’s teat.’ KP believes this makes his followers “like him.” And, indeed, everyone makes a show of reveling in murder and torture, though most do so out of fear, rather than a sincere bloodlust.
  2. Yeolar the Leveler – Believes the current system of government is not only corrupt, but fundamentally flawed. Only a society that guarantees equal access to wealth is justified. Since no such society exists, Yeolar has determined to make one. Within her band, loot is distributed evenly, and decisions are made communally. They prefer to kill the wealthy and powerful, since such people will never willingly agree to participate in a leveled society. But sometimes, work is work, and they’ll do what they have to.
  3. Faenrik the Slayer – Only a handful of Faenrik’s closes confidants know that he is actually Sir Fulton, an honorable knight of the realm. He leads a double life, disguising himself in a battered suit of plate armor whenever he’s with his band of ne’er do wells. If this fact were discovered, it would be a great scandal.
  4. Gabriel Tellison – Unbeknownst to anyone, the much feared Tellison gang is led by an angel, who has been sent by God to test our faith.
  5. Penelope Croust – Once, she was a paladin. But she was too fond of being paid for her good deeds, always expecting a reward when she saved someone. Eventually her avarice caused her to fall, and lose her powers. Rather than seek redemption, she’s embraced a life of using her fighting prowess to earn as much gold as she can.
  6. Edward Von Kleght – Formerly head of a prominent carpenter’s guild. A few years back, the crown undertook a massive public works project, which required nearly all the carpenters in the guild. Once the project was done, the crown decided the work was too expensive, and cut costs by cheating many of their laborers out of fair wages. The carpenters were in a frenzy of rage, and Von Kleght led them out to prey upon the kingdom that had cheated them. 
  7. General Tusurio – After months upon months of late and missing pay, Tusurio and a group of other soldiers determined they’d had enough, and could make better money on their own terms. The highest rank Tusurio ever legitimately achieved was sergeant, but he and his men decided promotions for themselves were in order after they deserted the army.
  8. Bovilare Ostencluck – Ostensibly, a sickly old woman with an uncanny knack for knowing when and where to strike to maximize profits. She always stays behind a curtain, and no one in her band has seen her face. She maintains this anonymity because she’s actually a highly intelligent chicken who just doesn’t want to lay eggs or get eaten. She usually stays at the groups hideout, but is sometimes carried around in her curtained litter.
  9. Benji Poppinjay – Formerly a rat catcher, who unsettled his fellows with his strange passion for the work. He even went so far as to invent a rat goddess, which he began to worship in weird ceremonies, until he was run out of town. He learned to sustain himself by adapting the principles of rat trapping to trap humans, and a small following began to take shape around him. 
  10. Kinlee Wouldabeen – A prophesied child of destiny, meant to overthrow evil and establish an era of peace. As it turns out, however, overthrowing evil is hard. Kinlee just sorta stopped trying at some point, and turned to the much simpler life of doing whatever was needed to make a few coins. 
  11. Hugo Urasha – is not actually Hugo Urasha. The real Hugo died quietly in his tent, when a doppleganger sucked out his innards through his mouth. The thing now presenting itself as the fierce leader of a notorious band  is not human at all. Some of the men have noticed the sudden shift in their leader’s behavior. They seem to be consistently doing very similar work, against very similar targets. But Hugo has always led them right before, and they’re still bringing in plenty of booty, so no one questions it.
  12. Pogo the Clown – Pogo began his life in the circus, where he had some moderate success as a clown. He always made a little money as a thug on the side. By the time anyone came looking for him, the circus would have moved on, and he’d be safe. Eventually his fellows got fed up with the bad reputation he was giving them, and kicked him out. Now Pogo is a thug full time, still wearing his clown costume and makeup for some unfathomable reason.
  13. Murza Zill – A lesbian who was never very good at disguising her preferences. Rather than force herself to endure the dicks of the conservative culture she was born into, Murza chose to strike out on her own and see what sort of living she could make. A band has slowly formed around her. Some are drawn to her success, while others are drawn to the idea of living in a group where they can safely be gay.
  14. Three Dick Jack – A bunch of people follow him because he’s got three dicks and that’s awesome.
  15. Father Sedgwick – Hoping to save souls, Father Sedgewick started traveling with the band to preach, and to hear confessions. He hoped to slowly show these people the error of their ways, but the opposite ended up happening. One compromise led to another, and to another, and now Father Sedgwick leads the band himself.
  16. Renuar Estavon – Poetry without struggle is trash. At least, that’s what Renuar believes. Believing his own work had begun to suffer from his too-comfortable, too-safe, too-law-abiding lifestyle, Renuar decided to leave it all behind to seek a life of adventure and hardship. Something that would inform his poetry, and allow him to reach greater artistic heights.
  17. Ms. S.C. Rowe – She’s not really sure how it happened, but one day she just…came to life. There, up on a post in the middle of a field, with memories of being an unliving facsimile whose only purpose was to scare off birds. Then bam, she was alive, she climbed down off her post, and ran off into the woods to figure out what the heck was going on. She’s still just a bundle of hay wrapped up in clothes, and yet she thinks and feels all on her own. She’s terrified people will find out what she is and destroy her, so she works on the edge of society, with just her band for company.
  18. Yasui Leiko – A warrior from a far off land, armed with strange weapons, and wearing strange armors. When she was exiled from her home, she set out to wander, going further than almost any of her people had ever gone before. She does not know any local language, but instead communicates with her band through her tone and gestures.
  19. Willie Jopho – Even when he was a young boy, Willie knew he wanted to live this life. He looked up to the men and women who lived by their own law, making money by their strength and ferocity, and he scorned the weakness of their victims. He ran off to join a band when he was a teenager, where he learned the trade, before breaking off to found his own group.
  20. Lanky Jim Wheeler – A former pirate whose ship sank during a storm. Was able to lead his crew to safety, but couldn’t find a new ship for them. Until they can find a good one to steal, they’re sticking to “land-piracy.”
  21. Niklaus Trapp – A con man, working both sides of the law. He moves to a new area, establishes a band of ruffians, skillfully leads them to becoming wanted men, then absconds with the booty and turns his own men in to the law for the reward money. 
  22. Big Nero – A gentle giant of a man who doesn’t realize what he’s doing. He thinks he’s dreaming, living out fantasies of adventure. His own men encourage this fantasy, as they’ve never had so much success as they’ve had under Big Nero. A man completely unafraid, because he doesn’t think the danger is real.
  23. Hugh Mann – On the planet Dasdukk, gold is a bountiful resource. The peoples who live there discovered a way to use it as a source of fuel, and now they travel the stars in great ships powered by gold. Recently, a collision with a meteor destroyed an auxiliary fuel tank on one of their ships, which was forced to make an emergency landing on Earth. Imagine their horror when they discovered how rare gold was on this disgusting little rock in space. They had just enough fuel left to create a single human suit, which they take turns wearing to go out and lead a group of humans in acquiring gold by any means necessary.
  24. Rockington – A creature of the deep sub-earth, who has only recently discovered that the worms of the surface world have been digging beneath their domain, plundering the natural wonders of the subterranean. This infuriates Rockington, who now scourges the surface with a band of treasonous humans. They may take all they like of the wine, the food, the silks, the papered moneys, etcetera. But all precious metals and stones must be returned to their rightful place beneath the earth.
  25. Jordanna Wheeler – Wishes are tricky things. When Jordanna had the opportunity to make her innermost desires a reality, she wished to be the most desirable woman in the land, living a life of excitement. The very next instant she found herself in a camp, surrounded by bloodthirsty thugs who regarded her as their leader. She tried to flee home, only to discover a flyer, with her own face sketched on it, naming her the most wanted woman in the land, with a massive bounty for her capture, dead or alive.
  26. Shimmercoat – A young woman who wears a suit of wolf skins, sewn together. She’s convinced that her true father was a wolf, and that her mother only hid it from her out of shame. Most folks think she’s crazy, but her obsessive striving to be as swift and fierce as “her wolf ancestors,” has led her to becoming a surprisingly effective fighter.
  27. Georgina Louverture – A few months, maybe a year or two. That’s how long a person survives after the black polyps start to appear on their neck. With nothing left to lose, Georgina figured she’d throw herself into danger, to make as much money for her family as she could before she died. That was three years ago. The polyps now cover her neck entirely, and have begun to spread down across her chest. There are some days she can’t do anything other than lie in bed and leak a grey bile. Yet, she isn’t dead, so she keeps going, sending every coin she takes back home.
  28. Simone Ninel – Teaching is a tough job, particularly if you insist on being honest about it. After being dismissed by a few noble patrons for teaching their children the “wrong” facts, Simone found it impossible to find any work.Pushed to the edge of society, she turned to violence to make ends meet. The band which has formed around her is the best educated group of thugs you’ll ever meet. 
  29. Horace – When Horace’ mother laid her eggs in the corpse of a wizard, she thought nothing of it. She thought very little at all, in fact, because she was a turtle. When the homunculic amalgam of turtle and infant was found, it was taken in by an elderly warrior; an exile from a far off land who raised the turtle-child in the warrior traditions of his home. He managed to keep Horace’ existence secret for years, until some people from the nearby village spotted the child, believing him to be a demon. They burned the house, killed Horace’ mentor, and Horace himself only barely escaped into the night. Now an adolescent, Horace uses the skills his mentor gave him to survive, and a small band of ruffians has formed around him.
  30. The Black Tree – The true name of this creature is a very particular sound that can be produced by rustling leaves. No symbols exist in human language to correlate to that sound, as no human is capable of approximating it, so “The Black Tree” will have to suffice. Grown in soil fertilized by the blood of god, the Black Tree grows man-things like fruit in its branches. Each year, 10-30 new men are grown to replace those who have died. All fruit of the Black Tree obey its will: take what men value, sow discord among them.
  31. Wadduda – An exceptionally intelligent horse, with a dead, taxidermied human on its back. Wadduda has become a skilled ventriloquist and puppeteer. She convincingly gesticulates with the ‘man’ on her back, so that no one realizes it’s actually the horse doing the talking, the fighting, and the leading.
  32. Grey DeLisle – A young woman with an almost erotic fascination with fire. It plays some creative role in almost every plan she employs, as well as a terrifying role in her philosophy of enforcing discipline among her band.
  33. Austera Wuster – A complete narcissist, convinced of her own infallibility. Austera is a bumbling moron, but her band of thugs props up her ego, because the more credit she gets for their misdeeds, the less likely any of them are to be caught or punished.
  34. Davberton Jonesmith – ‘Davberton,’ of course, is not a real name. It’s the kind of name someone comes up with when someone asks them what their name is, and they can’t tell the truth, so they play out a mid-’90s sitcom joke. I mean, it’s not like you can just tell people that you’re a dead person wearing the skins of the living as a disguise. Not that Davberton is dead…he’s totally alive. Totally.
  35. Marcia Gallika – A harsh woman who wears a cat-o-nine-tails at her side. She claims it is the same one which tore at the flesh of Christ before the crucifixion, and plays up her identity as a gleeful scourge of all that is good and wholesome.
  36. Gurbo Zalamticus – Lost a hand some years ago, and decided to have a short sword mounted on the stump. He’s a competent leader, but by no means an exceptional one. People tend to overestimate him because of his sword-hand. To his credit, he does realize this.
  37. Taukum – A 12 year old girl whose parents were terrible people. So, she killed them, and left their bodies in the street before leaving her hometown forever. She’s a muscular child, with a brutal temperament.
  38. Ereet Furn: A cultist devoted to the Blue Lady, who will reduce the world to a frozen wasteland upon her coming. Ereet seeks to bring about the dawn of her era through leading this band. Only a few of Ereet’s followers know that her true purpose is not to acquire wealthy, but to foster chaos.
  39. Olso Na – Not a bad guy, really. He’s easygoing, charming, and never cheats in games of chance. But it’s a tough world, and there aren’t a lot of ways for a guy who likes to make his own way to get by. So sometimes you gotta get a little rough to make your money, that’s just the way the world turns. 
  40. Lil’ Bippie –An 8 year old prodigy who was ready to be an adult by the time he was 5. Since his parents insisted on treating him like a child, and since no one was willing to hire a child, he set out to make his own way in the world. Obviously he can’t quite stand up to an adult physically, but Lil’ Bippie is a clever guy, who knows how to set up an ambush, and he’s got enough adults on his payroll to make those ambushes pack a punch. He’s also got a strange way of getting other children to “snap out of” their own childishness, which many people find deeply unsettling.
  41. Alicia Poverdagh – Dying is never really fair. Why should one person starve to death, while others have food rotting in their stores because they can’t host feasts quickly enough to use it all? Alicia may have tolerated that while she was alive, for some reason, but now that she’s a ghost, beyond the realm of consequences, she’d like to enact judgement upon those who have so much, while she had so little. She doesn’t “Lead” her band, so much as she comes to them in dreams, whispers in their ears, and occasionally appears to terrify their victims.
  42. Nadochk: A street performer, who isn’t afraid to engage in a little more dangerous work if the price is right. She and her band prefer to make their money via their antics if possible, but when money is tight they know which end of the sword to hold.
  43. Tzim Aulur: A splinter of divinity, living the first of its infinite lives. As far as it can tell, life is a game, and everyone else is just playing it too cautiously. Tzim does not understand death, believing that anyone who dies is simply ‘out of the game’ until the next round.
  44. Wife: A former daughter of nobility, who always resented her limited role. On the day of her wedding, she ran off, managed to escape capture, and hide aboard a ship destined for lands beyond her parent’s control. Even still, she has needed to live on the outskirts of society, lest her name make it back home, where surely someone would be sent to collect her. She still wears her bridal gown, the only clothes she had on her back when she ran. It’s now been cut into a more functional garment, but is still recognizable. Since she doesn’t want to give out her name, she’s been only too happy to adopt the nickname “Wife” her followers gave her.
  45. Sullas Oulor: As a child, Sullas made a little wish of no consequence. All that matters is that a fairy offered to grant her wish in exchange for some future favor, which she agreed to. A lifetime later, when Sullas had a husband and children, and had forgotten all about her wish, the fairy came again, and demanded a great sum of money from her. Not because it wanted the money, but because it wanted to see if she could get it. She had one year to get the job done, so Sullas frantically set to work. Faeries will do a lot worse than break your legs if you fail to pay your debts.
  46. Spider Dave: Spider Dave lost an eye years ago, and lets his pet tarantula live in the socket.
  47. Finster Mirman: For crimes that are unspeakable in any language spoken through empty air, Finster was banished from the realms of the sea king. It was thought that he would die of exposure on the shores, but Finster refused to go out so easily. He dragged himself into the woods, where he found a pond. There he made his plan. It wasn’t hard to find humans willing to do his bidding, and through them he constructed a set of land-legs, and a glass helmet of seawater to sustain him.
  48. Rope Burn Tim: A thief and a killer who was tried, and set to be hanged. Then he was hanged, and his neck didn’t snap. For a good minute he struggled at the end of the rope, before the rope broke, and he fell safely to the ground. By law, this was seen as an act of god, and Tim was released. He immediately put together a new gang, and spent awhile terrorizing the community that had tried to kill him. His voice is still hoarse, and his neck still bears the scar. He never took the rope off from around his neck, preferring to wear it as a reminder to his men and to his enemies that he can’t be killed.
  49. Ginny Bo: An older man, well into his twilight years. To look at him, you’d think he was too frail to do the things he’s done. But as he reaches the end of his life, he’s come to believe that all his quiet years of responsibility were a waste. He’s determined to fill his final days with as many adventurous thrills as he can.
  50. Suzera the Slasher, and her Seven Sisters: A group of peasant women who were frustrated by the choice between being a wife and…well, nothing else. Most of them were content just to grouse about it to one another, but Suzera’s the one who got the idea that the group should kill some of the wealthier men in the village, take their money, and abscond out into the wilderness. The band has been wandering around ever since, taking what they need, and killing for money. 
  51. Lord Reggie Windsley the VII: AKA “The Blackguard of Havensforth” Spoiled son of the local lord, Reggie took on the persona of The Blackguard a few years back, and began terrorizing his own lands as a kind of prank. Hundreds of his own subjects have had their lives destroyed, or even been killed, for this childish lark, and Reggie doesn’t have an iota of remorse. 
  52. Bossen Grust: A servant to Folar Est, lord of the lands just to the south of here. Folar sent Bossen north, to weaken his rival’s lands through brigandage. Bossen has taken a real liking to the life, drawing money both through his thievery, and through requests for support back to lord Folar. He’s decided to stick with this life as long as he can, then probably abandon Folar’s service, once the old fool gets wise.
  53. Gin Nolk: A consummate warrior, with complete disdain for any way of life that is not combat-based. She enjoys pillaging farmers, and believes that they deserve it because they are stupid. If they were smart, they’d be warriors. 
  54. Purbo the Brutal: Purbo is lean, and muscular, and completely hairless. His sickly pale skin is covered head-to-toe in tattoos. He walks around naked, save for a belt with his weapons and coin purse hanging form it.
  55. Ferdi Black: Rides on the back of a bear. No one is quite sure how she managed to train a bear to serve as a mount, but it does.
  56. Rattenik: A beefy woman who runs an ostensibly respectable group of caravan guards for hire. Anytime business gets too slow, though, she personally sees to it that every merchant who comes within a 10′ mile radius of town is robbed.
  57. Zurbo the Annihilator: Got his start as a circus performer, who wore colorful masks, and wrestled other performers for the amusement of the crowd. But when you’re as good as Zurbo is, why should you be content with the pennies people pay to see your show? Why not just pin them down and take all their money?
  58. Benito Garveson: Left home 6 years ago to do his mandatory stint in the army. Only made it about halfway there before he lost his nerve. The army is meatgrinder. It sends men to far off lands to get chopped up and die on some forsaken battlefield for no real reason. At some point, Benito just wandered off the road, hoping to lose himself in the woods. He found a cave filled with a trapper’s supplies, and lived off those long enough to get the idea that if he had to be a man of violence, at least he could stick close to home.
  59. Father Routney: Supposedly a priest, disgusted with the godlessness of the world, and “extracting God’s tithe by force.” No word yet from the church on whether Father Routney is an ordained priest, or just a brigand with a collar.
  60. Suzie “Princess” Dulden: A young woman who is shockingly strong, given her waifish appearance. She frequently lures her victims into traps, by putting on a fancy gown, and pretending to be a damsel in distress.
  61. Robolo: As a younger woman, Robolo did something which she refuses to discuss with anyone. Whatever it was, though, would have brought unbearable shame upon her family. To spare them that, she faked her own death, and changed her name. She turned to banditry and mercenary work to stay off the grid, so no one would ever discover the terrible truth. 
  62. Sir Tergio Gault: A decade or so back, a coalition of nobles banded together to revolt against their king. The nobles lost, and were sentenced to death as traitors. Only Sir Tergio Gault managed to escape capture. But with all his lands seized, and a bounty on his head, there’s no work left to him but the life of an outlaw.
  63. Nunak: A massive, muscle-bound woman from the frozen lands of the north. She lives by no laws, and travels the world seeking adventure. Today, she is a mercenary, tomorrow a bandit, the day after a robber of tombs, and always, she is a conqueror.
  64. Kessliger: A clever Kobold, who does his work via traps rather than direct confrontation.
  65. David: A man obsessed with biblical heroes, to the point of renaming himself after his favorite. He has a fetishistic love of the sling as a weapon, and will often launch himself into lengthy monologues about its versatility and elegance. He’s more than a little unhinged.
  66. Hozeron Crous: Once caught a nymph by her toe, and was granted a wish to release her. As a result, anyone working for Hozeron is completely invulnerable to harm. Due to some nymphish trickery, Hozeron herself has no special protection. However, her followers are well aware of this, and will happily leap in front of arrows to protect their leader. After all, the arrow can’t hurt them.
  67. Lucana The Hungry: A woman who ritualistically cannibalizes one of her victims after each job. It’s a purely performative thing, she derives no great pleasure from it, but it makes people respect her, and she likes that.
  68. Tall Sue: ‘Taint got no legs. She rides around on a horse, with a special saddle to help her stay upright and in control.
  69. Bog Boy Jeffy: He’s swamp folk, and his pappy was swamp folk, and his brothers and sisters is swamp folk too. Their home is the deep, fetid places where they will never be found, and where anyone who searches for them will likely die of horrible disease.
  70. Rinny Eyeling: A small woman with an obsessive love of cats. There are more cats in her band than there are people, but despite her compulsive behavior, her followers stick with her because she’s undeniably effective. Outsiders think the cats bring her luck. People who have been with the band for awhile know the real truth: the cats obey her commands.
  71. Zerdia Gabblestan: A young woman, deformed from birth by bulging protrusions of bone, which give her a “lumpy” appearance. They also make her look fearsome, and serve as a kind of natural armor, so that she’s very difficult to harm. She probably won’t live past 40, but she’s intent on using what time she has to take as much wealth for herself as she can.
  72. Lilanio Prussage: Disgusted by the evils of society, and unable to force change through any positive action she ever attempted, Lilanio determined that the only way to make things better was to dedicate her life to making things so much worse that people would be forced to rise up in revolt and demand better lives for themselves.
  73. Bucky The Drunk: A lucky drunk who is in way over his head.
  74. Pustaso Vega: For some fool reason, Pustaso got it into his head that Angelita would love him if only he could prove his boldness. For years now, he’s been charging headlong into danger, and by some mix of charm, luck, and talent, he keeps managing to get out again. In his mind, news of his deeds makes its way back to Angelita, and she’s back home just waiting for him to come and marry her. In reality, she hasn’t heard of, or thought about him in years, and doesn’t really care.
  75. Skello: A very smart skeleton, who wants to free other skeletons from their meat prisons, and make a ton of money doing it. He’s willing to work with meat-jailers to get the job done, if need be.
  76. Higgins: A prim and proper butler to an established and lordly family during the day. A heartless, merciless killer whenever nobody is looking. He has served his noble patrons so long and so faithfully, that he is often trusted with jobs that allow him to work unmolested for weeks or months at a time. 
  77. Crazy Bob Futureman: It’s nearly impossible to take Crazy Bob seriously. He’s a distractable babbler who seems almost incapable of listening to a person for more than 30 seconds before latching on to some random thing they’ve said, and using it as a springboard into his own mad ravings. Crazy Bob is also a skilled diviner, who knows the truth and falsehood of things people say, can speak with plants and animals, locate people and objects at will, and even occasionally see the future. He also knows how to be a violent motherfucker when he needs to be.
  78. Claudio A man who suffers from moderate physical and mental disabilities, which made him the object of derision within his small town. From early childhood, other children were encouraged to treat him like a monster, and the abuse persisted into his adult life. But despite a slowness of speech and a difficulty with reading and writing, Claudio is not an idiot. When it comes to planning and executing acts of theft and violence, he’s actually quiet skilled.
  79. Brandi Marlo A short, athletic, happy-go-lucky young woman who comes from a completely different world. One much more similar to our own world in the year 1985. There are no dragons or magic or boobytrapped dungeons in her world, and she finds what we do a great deal more entertaining. Particularly because anything from our world seems to have a difficult time harming or killing her. She’s a massed a band of followers, and is generally willing to do whatever people will give her money for. She has no moral qualms about hurting us, because she’s not actually convinced that we’re entirely real.
  80. Simple Bartholomew: A jaundiced young man who probably doesn’t have very long to live, though no one has ever been able to figure out quite why. His anger at the inevitable shortness of his own life has led him to become apathetic to the suffering and deaths of others. Everything he does is one big joke to him, and he will typically stage jobs to deliver some sort of existentialist punchline.
  81. Gridin: Though in every way, Gridin acts like a simple brigand out to make as much money as he can, he is actually a devout priest of Kurznak the Chaos God. Gridin’s apparent greed is actually religious devotion, as he attempts to sow as much chaos into the world as he can. All the money he makes personally is donated to the church, to further spread chaos throughout the world.
  82. Ostroggala: Like everyone who lived in her area, when Ostroggala was 15, she visited the local oracle to learn something about her future. For most folks, it was some cryptic nonsense that only made sense after the fact. For Ostroggala, for the first time anyone could remember, it was straightforward: “You will die peacefully in your bed.” So, with the absolute assurance that she would never die a violent death, Ostroggala set out on a life of mercenary adventurism, and banditry.
  83. Dekesh Saum: An escapee from a wealthy merchant’s harem, who led a number of his fellow consorts to freedom. They faced too much prejudice in the outside world to lead any kind of normal life, and so settled on survival by violence.
  84. Wayne Kayle: A vigilante with a warped sense of justice, who believes the poor are only poor because they’re not smart, or good enough to be rich. She punishes the poor for this with her own brand of being ‘smart.’ As in, she takes your shit, and aren’t you a dummy for not being able to stop her?
  85. Pumpanius Drex: Pumpanius and her band don’t really want to live this life. They’d much rather settle down, build some houses, plant some crops, and raise some families. But unless they want to try and live in some of the awful towns in the area (they super don’t), then they’re going to need to settle some new land. And unless they want to go on a years-long, perilous trek across land (they don’t), they’re going to need a ship that can sail them to an empty plot where they can settle. And ships cost money, so they’re going to steal and murder until they’ve got enough. The people around here are assholes anyway, so it doesn’t really matter.
  86. Brettier Sulva: An escaped slave, determined to die rather than go back into servitude. During her escape, she killed several of her “owners,” and as a result there’s a massive bounty for her capture, dead or alive.
  87. An: A woman who’s in way over her head. About a year ago, she was in a tight spot, and used some sleight-of-hand magic to convince some tough guys she was a powerful wizard. One thing led to another, and now she’s leading a band of those tough guys, using smoke and mirrors to keep up appearances. She’s enjoying all the money and respect, but she knows it can’t last, and is a little worried about how she’s going to extricate herself from this mess.
  88. Teguska Dane: A proud old military man, tired of his soft, wastrel grandchildren. Society as a whole has gone soft, as far as he’s concerned, so he’s going to spend the last few precious years of his life living like the old days. Sleeping in muck, and killing men for his pay.
  89. Vera Vateli: A devout, suicidal catholic. She wants to die, but believes wholeheartedly that she will go to hell if she kills herself. Instead, she’s taken up the most dangerous life she could imagine, and hopefully she’ll get killed along the way. Although, much to her frustration, it hasn’t happened yet. Of course, she always pursues targets which she deems somehow sinful, so she can tell herself she’s acting as an instrument of god’s will, rather than just a murderer.
  90. Anthony Caldwell: A doe eyed, green horned, bushy tailed farm boy who has no business being out here doing this nonsense. But as it happens, he’s either got a phenomenal natural talent for it, or he’s just lucky as heck.
  91. Prue Jirard: A puppet, brought to life as an ironic consequence of someone’s poorly considered wish. Feels as though she has no place within society. She puts on a show of being angry and superior, but really she just wants to be loved. 
  92. Timothy Brentwood: Big Jon Jeffy, a notorious outlaw, disappeared without a trace. This was a problem for the local elites, who had spent years covering up their own inadequacies by shifting the people’s focus onto their relentless hunt for Big Jon. Hoping to win some popularity with the mob, they hired Timothy Brentwood, an actor who bore a striking resemblance to Big Jon, to play the role during a mock trial. The plan was that he’d be found guilty, sentenced to a life of hard toil in the silver mines, then quietly released once no one was looking for him any longer. Unfortunately, the plan went awry when Big Jon’s old gang busted Timothy Brentwood out of prison. They think they’ve got Big Jon back, and Timothy is just trying to find out how he can get out of this crazy mess alive.
  93. Jimmy Silver: A jolly fat man who uses the most creative profanity you’ve ever heard. Frequently disguises himself as a beggar so he can bum around towns, listening for information about any juicy scores that might be worth his time.
  94. Kylie Kallgren: A lumberjane with a foul temper. One day, whilst chopping down a tree, a group of wealthy merchants walked by and treated her the way wealthy assholes tend to treat lumber-folk. So she chopped em’ up, threw the bits in the river, and took their stuff. Then she realized that a woman who knows how to swing an axe could make a lot more money killin’ folk than they could choppin’ trees.
  95. Elias Lindsey: A heretical nun, who had a dream that Jesus was a many-tentacled sea creature wearing a man-suit full of water. She’s spread her foul belief to a whole congregation of followers. The Church wants the whole lot of them executed, so they are forced to kill and steal to survive. It’s alright though, because Squid Jesus says the 6th commandment was a typo.
  96. Leisle Mondego: Commander of a local garrison of soldiers. Those soldiers who were forcibly enlisted as punishment for some crime are inducted into her band. If they refuse, they’re executed for ‘desertion.’) She always makes sure to allocate the rest of her forces so nobody is near enough to catch her or her band while they’re in the act.
  97. Daven Schumaker: A mystic who relies on tarot cards to decide when and where to lead his band.
  98. Viktor Hassendorf: A cyberpunk hacker who made some mistakes while attempting to hack a time machine. He got trapped in the past, where none of his technological skills are of any use to him at all. All he’s got is a few combat augmentations, and a healthy disrespect for the integrity of the timeline.
  99. Nathan Weeks: A human with a particular form of dwarfism that not only prevents them from growing taller, but also prevents them from physically maturing in other ways. To whit, despite being 38, Nathan doesn’t look a day older than 11.
  100. Daisy Mills: A woman with multiple personality disorder. Roll on this table several times to determine what her personalities are.

LotFP Class: Totem Magician (FFX Lulu)

A couple years back, I took some of the more interesting Final Fantasy X characters, and turned them into LotFP Classes. At the time, I’d intended to take a crack at Lulu, but she’s tough. She’s a bog-standard black mage, which is just the Final Fantasy equivalent of the Magic User. What is there to say?

Then recently, as I was writing about Fighter’s Armies, I started really digging in to the idea of class choice being more about complexity than about mechanics. I choose a fighter when I want to play something simple, I choose a magic user when I want to play something complicated. Naturally, this led me to thinking about switching those roles around. Create a complex fighter, and a simple magic user.

It’s hardly an original idea. D&D 3.5 made dozens of attempts to simplify the magic user with the Sorcerer, Warlock, Warmage, and so on. Fighters, of course, got the notorious Book of Weeaboo Fightan Magic. So it doesn’t escape me that I’m on thin ice here. This is an oft-traveled road, and it has led to some truly questionable results in the past. To make matters even worse, I’m going to throw in a magical resource pool. A thing which every 12-year-old tries, and which has basically never worked. But what the hell? I do this shit for fun.

The Totem Mage
Totem Mages are faking it. They don’t have any magical powers of their own. They just happened to be in the right place at the right time to make friends with a disembodied intelligence that needed someone to carry it around. Usually this intelligence treats their host like shit though, so it’s not all good luck.

The real magician is the intelligence, which lives inside a totem. Totems can can take many forms: a teddy bear, a ceramic doll, even a sock puppet. The only real requirement is that whatever form it takes should have a mouth, so it can whisper things to its host.

If the totem is destroyed, the host will need to find a suitable replacement. Until it has a new totem to live in, the intelligence can’t cast any spells.

When the situation calls for it, totem and host can separate and move around on their own, allowing the player to functionally control 2 characters. However, the host cannot cast spells without the totem. And without the host, the totem has a movement rate of 20′(60′), an armor rating of 12, 1 hit point, and all of its saving throws require a 17 or better.

Totem mages share their hit dice and saves with the Magic User, and use the Fighter’s experience table.

Totem Mage Casting

All of the Totem Mage’s spells are evocations which deal 1d6 damage per caster level. Whenever they cast, the Totem Mage must choose what shape their spell will take, and what type of damage their spell will deal.

There are 5 possible spell shapes, most of which require the Totem Mage to spend some of their mana. For each level the Totem Mage has, they have 3 points of mana in their mana pool. The pool can only be replenished by a full night’s sleep.

Spell Shapes

Touch (0 Mana): Affects a single target after a successful melee touch attack. Since it costs 0 mana, this shape allows the Totem Mage to continue casting even after their mana pool is completely empty for the day.

Thrown (1 Mana): The caster forms a little ball in their hand, which they throw. Affects a single target after a successful ranged touch attack.

Line (2 Mana): The caster points a finger, and a line 60′ long and 5′ wide erupts from that starting point. Everyone along the line takes damage, but may attempt a saving throw versus Breath for half.

Cone (3 Mana): The caster splays their hands out, thumb touching thumb, and a cone of energy erupts from them. The cone is 60′ long, and spreads out to be 40′ wide at its terminus. Everyone within this area takes damage, but may attempt a saving throw versus Breath for half.

Sphere (4 Mana): The caster indicates a target individual or location within their line of sight. From that spot, a sphere of energy erupts out to a 30′ radius. Anything within this space takes damage, but may attempt a saving throw versus Breath for half.

Damage Types

Whatever shape the Totem Mage casts in, they need something to fill that space. It wouldn’t do much good to cast a cone of “gentle breeze” after all. The spell needs to pack some punch.

At every odd numbered level (1, 3, 5, 7, etc), the Totem Mage should roll to determine a new type of damage that they’ve managed to add to their repertoire. If they roll something they’ve already got, re-roll until you get something new.

At first, the Totem Mage must roll on the basic list. After level 6, however, they may choose whether they want to roll on the basic list, or the advanced list. Most of the advanced damage types allow the caster to sacrifice some number of damage dice from their roll. These sacrificed dice will lead to some additional effect on their targets.

Referee and player should both bear in mind that every damage type will have some things it is particularly effective against, and some things it may not be effective against at all.

Basic Damage Types

  1. Fire – A self-explanatory element. The referee should note any objects in the area which may catch fire. Using the Touch spell shape, this can also be used to light candles, burn ropes, cauterize wounds, etc.
  2. Cold – Heat drains away from the area, possibly forming little crystals of ice. Can also be used to freeze water, chill drinks, stave relieve heat stroke, etc.
  3. Acid – A liquid which melts organic material, such as flesh and wood. Has no effect on minerals, such as stone or metal.
  4. Metal Shards – Little spinning shards of metal fill the space, piercing and slicing everything they touch.
  5. Electricity – Lightning arcs between every available target. A caster using the Touch spell shape may be able to feed a machine a steady stream of electricity, turning them into a kind of walking battery.
  6. Sonic – Vibrations pierce the ears of anything that can hear, shatter glass or crystal, and may even shake a few screws loose from constructs.

Advanced Damage Types

  1. Poison Gas – The caster may sacrifice half of their damage dice to require anyone who failed their save to make a second save against Poison. On failure, the targets will fall asleep.
  2. Force – A relentless bludgeoning which strikes over and over again like a thousand fists. For each die of damage the caster sacrifices, targets who are hit must move back 10′. If a target makes their save versus Breath, then they only need to move back half the total distance.
  3. Pure Arcane Magic – Ignores all elemental or physical immunities, and does not allow for misses or saves. However, instead of dealing d6s of damage, the caster must roll d4s.
  4. Gravity – Targets are slammed prone against the ground with force. For each die of damage sacrificed, the earth gives way beneath the targets, pulling them down into a pit 5′ deep for each die sacrificed. (The pit is formed by the downward force of their body, so there is no falling damage). If a target makes their save versus Breath, then any pit they make is only half as deep.
  5. Vitality Drain – Eldritch tentacles reach into the targets’ bodies and rip out their essences. For each target which takes at least 1 hit point of damage, the caster gains 1 hit point, up to their usual maximum.
  6. Earth – A hail of stones and dirt rise up from the ground to pelt the targets. If the caster sacrifices half of their damage dice, they may bury their targets up to the waist. If they sacrifice all of their damage dice, they may bury their targets entirely beneath a heap of dirt and stone. If a target makes their save versus Breath, then if they would have been completely buried, they are only half buried. And if they would have been half buried, they are not buried at all.

 

 

 

 

1d100 Payments

giphyMoney may not always be sufficient for the goods or services that the players want. Extraordinary desires can only be satisfied by extraordinary payments.

Not every payment here will be suitable for every situation, so feel free to re-roll if the payment doesn’t fit your needs. On the other hand, don’t be afraid to massage your situation a bit to make an interesting payment type work.

Many of the payments listed below can work on several different levels. For example, if the roll indicates that the creditor wants a pig, that can mean a lot of things. They may want any pig, or they may want some specific pig which they are covetous of. They may want a pig of a certain quality, or the may want to force the indebted to experience what it is like to lose a pig, for some unknowable purpose. My point being: none of the payments should be taken simply as they are written. There is room for a bit of creativity with them.

  1. The indebted character must surrender a pound of flesh to their creditor. They may opt to take the flesh from anywhere they like, but regardless of where it is taken from, it will likely result in some degree of physical disability, determined by the referee. A chunk from a leg might result in slower movement speeds, a chunk from the torso might lower constitution, etc.
  2. The creditor requires the indebted’s soul. The consequences of soul loss must be determined by the referee. A reduced, or no response to clerical magics, a certainty of an unpleasant afterlife, a reduced ability to resist mind-affecting magics…many things might be said to be possible only through the benefit of a soul.
  3. The creditor requires a soul. It does not need to be any particular soul. In most cases, souls must be offered willingly, and the indebted may find themselves offering faustian bargains to others. The referee may also allow some means of forcibly extracting or binding a soul for this purpose. Souls can also be purchased from creatures of the lower planes, though these do not come cheap. Nor will their cost be measured in currency.
  4. The indebted must surrender one of their fingers. Assuming it’s the first one, they can probably get away with just one of their pinkies. There’s no penalty for that! Eventually, though, missing fingers start to add up.
  5. The indebted must endure the removal of one of their eyes as payment. They take a significant penalty to making ranged attacks.
  6. The indebted must be scalped. The process is immensely painful, and a severe shock to the system, reducing the indebted to a mere 1d4 hit points. Their hair never really grows back properly.
  7. 1d4 pints of the indebted’s blood are required. A loss of 1 may be fairly negligible. 2 will be a severe shock to the system. Any more than that will reduce the indebted to 1 hit point, and they will be unable to adventure for 3 or 4 weeks.
  8. The indebted must provide a sample of their reproductive legacy: either an egg, or some of their semen. (In the former case, some means of extraction will need to be provided). Presumably, whomever wants this has a way of making use of it.
  9. The indebted must seek out and retrieve a particular rare plant, which is an essential ingredient in some recipe their creditor wishes to prepare.
  10. The indebted must surrender one of their secrets. Incidental secrets will not do. They cannot reveal their mother’s maiden name, or any other fact which is not known simply because no one cares to know it. The secret provided must be something which would be damaging to the indebted if it became known. One example would be a shameful thing that would ruin the character’s reputation. (Players may opt to create a shameful backstory detail for their character if they wish). Another option is something which the character benefits from exclusive knowledge of: such as a spell or technique, the hiding place of a treasure horde, or even a piece of blackmail the character is using against an NPC.
  11. The indebted must subject themselves to torture, and allow the creditor to extract their suffering from them via a strange apparatus.
  12. The creditor has fallen in love with a particular person, who does not love them back. The indebted must make that person fall in love with their creditor. Or, if all else fails, kidnap that person and bring them to the creditor, who will hold them hostage until Stockholm syndrome sets in.
  13. The indebted must surrender a loved one to their creditor. It’s unclear what happens to this loved one, they may be killed, or enslaved, or experimented on, but regardless of the specifics, they will be taken from their normal life and put to some use deemed appropriate by the creditor. In this instance, not just any person will do. It must be someone the indebted cares deeply about. The creditor may have a means by which to verify this.
  14. The creditor wishes to be paid in slaves. They may come from anywhere, but must be of good quality: strong, attractive, capable, and able to understand a language the creditor speaks. Not so young or so old as to be useless.
  15. The indebted must betray an existing trust, perhaps with a friendly NPC, or a member of the party. There may, or may not be a specific sort of betrayal required, but in either case it must be significant enough to destroy the indebted’s relationship with that person.
  16. The indebted must violate some vow which they had previously taken upon themselves. The vow may be religious, contractual, filial, et al. If the character is not currently subject to such a vow, they may be given the opportunity to go make a vow.
  17. The indebted must gain the trust of a person specified by their creditor. Once they’ve successfully become close with that person, they are obligated to betray them in some specific manner.
  18. The indebted must relinquish their right to seek justice for some wrongdoing. This may be a past wrongdoing–such as the murder of the character’s mother which has driven them to adventure–or it may be a future wrongdoing, anticipated by their creditor. In either case, the indebted cannot pursue either legal or vigilante justice for that specific wrong.
  19. The creditor wants the indebted’s voice. Obviously, once it is taken, the indebted will be unable to speak. Furthermore, the creditor may use their acquired voice in any number of ways.
  20. The Indebted must surrender their first born child. If they already have children, this must be done immediately. If they do not, they may or may not be expected to make an immediate effort to produce a child.
  21. At a future time of the creditor’s choosing, the indebted will be require to take no action. Most likely, the inaction of the indebted will cause some preventable ill to occur.
  22. Credit for one of the indebted’s accomplishments must instead be given to the creditor. It may be a past or a future accomplishment, and the transfer of credit may be either mundane (It was not I who slew the dragon. It was Dave!), or it may be magical (Everybody just remembers that it was Dave who slew the dragon the whole time).
  23. The indebted must surrender all of their weapons to the creditor. It does not matter whether they are special or not, so long as it is every weapon the indebted currently has access to.
  24. The creditor demands a vow of of nonviolence from the indebted, which will last for 1d4 (1-2. Days, 3-5. Weeks, 6. Months).
  25. The indebted must perform an assassination against a target of the creditor’s choosing.
  26. The indebted must agree to become the template for a clone, or group of clones, which will serve the will of their creditor.
  27. The creditor wishes to implant a device in the indebted’s eyes. This device will allow the creditor to record and review anything that the eyes see, for the rest of the indebted’s life.
  28. The creditor requires a new color. This may be as simple as procuring a rare kind of paint, or it may entail visiting other realities where colors exist which remain unimagined by mortal mind.
  29. The debt cannot be resolved until the indebted produces a new kind of music for their creditor. It must be wholly original to the creditor’s experience, which may be more or less difficult depending on the creditor’s musical experience. For some fat king who never leaves his hall, this may be as simple as bringing them folk music, archaic forms of music, or music from a far off land. For more musically experienced creditors, the indebted may need to invent Rock & Roll or something.
  30. The indebted must produce the solution to some mathematical problem. Unless the character is unusually skilled with math, it’s unlikely they will be able to find the solution simply by solving the problem themselves. They will either need to embark on a great mathematical study (Treat as a Math skill starting at 0-in-6, with 1 attempt allowed each time a new point is put into the skill), or they must find someone capable of the task to do it for them.
  31. The indebted must make a vow to uphold some noble ideal (Honesty, Justice, Chivalry, etc.)
  32. The indebted must make a vow to always subvert some noble ideal (Honesty, Justice, Chivalry, etc.)
  33. The creditor wants a spell. If the indebted is a spellcaster, they can simply allow their creditor to copy down one of theirs. If they are not a spellcaster, they will need to acquire a spell elsewhere.
  34. The indebted must sacrifice the lives of one of their companions. They may choose who, so long as it is someone who is currently traveling with them. If needed, they must be willing to assist their creditor in the murder.
  35. The creditor wants the storytelling rights to the indebted’s life. Shortly after this deal is struck, population centers will begin to be flooded with dimestore novels about the indebted’s various experiences and adventures. Enough about the particulars will be changed that no one will believe the Indebted if they try to point this out. If the indebted attempts to share any of their own experiences outside of intimate conversation, they will promptly be sued for infringing on their creditor’s intellectual property.
  36. The indebted must become a thrall to their creditor. The next time they would gain a level in their class, they instead gain a level in the Thrall of [Creditor] class. They gain 1d4 hit points, and must work exclusively to further their creditor’s will until they gain enough money to level up again. Since they will not be paid for their work as a thrall, they will need to hoard money in secret in order to level.
  37. The indebted must provide their creditor with hostages, to be held in security against any future reneging on the agreement between the two.
  38. The indebted must serve as a human subject for some experiment their creditor wishes to perform.
  39. The creditor is currently suffering under a curse, which can only be alleviated if someone (the indebted) accepts that same curse onto themselves.
  40. The indebted must trade bodies with their creditor.
  41. The indebted must trade some of their life, rapidly aging a few years in order to keep their creditor young.
  42. The indebted must surrender one of their senses: (1: Sight, 2: Smell, 3: Hearing, 4: Taste). Once lost, the indebted will no longer be able to perform any actions which require this sense. If their lost ability is restored to them, it will be taken back from whomever is using it, and the indebted will be considered a thief. (Though there may be some way to gain a new sense).
  43. The creditor requires the indebted’s essence! The referee should roll the creditor’s ability scores if they haven’t. Compare these to the scores of the indebted. Randomly pick one score which the creditor has which is lower than the one the indebted has. The creditor wants to switch that score. If the indebted doesn’t have any higher scores, then they have nothing of value to offer the creditor, and cannot do business with them.
  44. The creditor demands some large number of foreskins, collected by the indebted. (Don’t look at me, this shit’s biblical. First Samuel, 18:25).
  45. The indebted must provide a boxed sample of their feces to their creditor. It’s unclear what they do with it, but apparently the indebted got off pretty easily. (Alright…I can’t blame the bible for this one.)
  46. The indebted must carry a message on their creditor’s behalf. The journey will not be easy, and should require at least a little adventuring. If the referee wants to rub a little salt in the wound, the message can be something completely trivial.
  47. The creditor requires a large amount of some specific trade good–flour, sugar, copper, lumber, etc. They will not accept the money required to buy what they need. They want it personally delivered by the indebted.
  48. The creditor requires a large delivery of military equipment. Armor, shields, weapons, enough to outfit a small army at least. They may even require experienced soldiers who can drill up new recruits.
  49. The indebted must deliver a massive quantity of foodstuffs. Quality and variety may vary, depending on the creditor’s requirements. There must be enough to feed a group all through the winter and summer.
  50. The indebted must deliver a map of an area which has not yet been explored, or which is kept secret.
  51. The indebted must never return to some place, ever again. This may be the town or country they are currently in, or some other place: their homeland, the territory of their creditor’s enemies or rivals, the territory of their creditor’s friends, etc.
  52. The indebted must accept the blame for something which is not their fault, allowing themselves to be scapegoated.
  53. The indebted must accept responsibility for some child, raising them as if they were the indebted’s own kin.
  54. The creditor will only accept the currency of some ancient civilization, which has not existed for eons.
  55. The indebted must give up their name. In doing so, any possible connection between their person and that name will be cosmically severed. Any legal documents which reference the indebted–such as deeds or contracts–will be rendered void. The indebted will also lose any reputation they had, as they can no longer be associated with what people have heard about them. They may choose a new name for themselves if they wish.
  56. The indebted must give up their ability to walk. Their legs will be sturdy enough to stand on, but the moment they try to move, they will collapse onto the ground.
  57. The creditor demands a poem, written and performed by the player.
  58. The indebted must vow to perform some great deed in their creditor’s name, eschewing any glory they might win for themselves on that occasion.
  59. The creditor must have an accurate prediction of the future. If the players are clever, they may say something like “the sun will rise tomorrow.” Barring some apocalyptic issue, this sort of answer will be acceptable to the creditor. Players may also attempt to find a reliable fortune teller, which can accomplish the same thing. If the prediction the indebted provides does not come true, their creditor will become angry, and put a price on their head.
  60. The indebted must provide their creditor with a certain value worth of items suitable for a magic lab.
  61. The indebted must seek out a magic staff for their creditor. It may be a specific staff, a specific type of staff, or just any staff in general.
  62. The creditor is a Bonemeister, and only accepts the bones of the indebted as payment. They are an expert at surgically extracting the bones, slicing their creditor open, carefully detaching all of the ligaments, and sewing the incision back up. When they’re done, it will be as if the bones simply teleported out of the indebted’s body, leaving part of them a bit floppy, but otherwise unharmed. Which specific bones the bonemeister requires will be negotiated in advance. The penalties for lacking those bones will be determined by the referee.
  63. The creditor want to be killed, and the indebted must do it. The creditor has wanted to die for a long time, but no one has yet been able to do it. When they are in danger, the creditor turns into a fearsome monster.
  64. The indebted must willingly agree to have an explosive device implanted into their brains. The creditor is happy to offer their services for free, but only if they can ensure that the indebted is incapable of ever working against them in the future.
  65. The creditor wishes to be entertained by a dance, which the player must perform for their group. A vote of the party will determine if the dance was sufficient for whatever purchase is being made.
  66. The indebted must seek out a true story or folk myth, and bring a full recounting of it back to their creditor. The creditor will then turn this story into a novel.
  67. The indebted must keep a steady watch over their creditor’s home for one night, defending it against the evils which will arise.
  68. The indebted must work towards some socially laudable goal within a specified kingdom. Something on the level of establishing gender or racial equality, raising the standard of living for the working class, etc.
  69. The creditor recently promised to grant someone’s wish. The indebted is tasked with ensuring that wish does come true.
  70. In indebted must make their creditor laugh.
  71. The indebted must give up their next critical hit, which will instead be a critical failure. The fortune of the critical hit will be transferred to their creditor.
  72. The indebted must provide a chunk of their brain. Not a big chunk, just a bit the size of a peanut. None the less, losing this chunk removes some knowledge from the indebted. Roll 1d6: (1-3. 1d2 Intelligence, 4-5. 1d2 Wisdom, 6. A point from a randomly determined skill.)
  73. The creditor wants an irreplaceable family heirloom from the indebted. Any object will do, regardless of value, so long as it is precious to its owner (whomever that may be).
  74. The indebted must provide the keys to their home, as well as any future keys which may result from moving or changing locks. The creditor is to have unfettered access to the indebted’s abode.
  75. The creditor wants a document, or other item, which would provide them with some kind of dynastic claim.
  76. The indebted must provide accurate and detailed information on the tactics of an enemy army, or, diagrams for an enemy stronghold or weapon.
  77. The creditor wants a letter of recommendation from the indebted.
  78. The indebted must agree to leave a certain location, person, or group alone. They cannot be pestered, regardless of the indebted’s needs.
  79. The creditor requires sanctuary from the indebted. They must be allowed to live on the indebted’s lands, and be protected from any and all forces which would threaten them.
  80. The indebted must provide a body part from a specific creature which will be difficult to hunt.
  81. The creditor wishes to know the location of an upcoming secret meeting. The indebted must find out, and provide it to their creditor, with enough time for the creditor to make arrangements either to spy on, or to ambush the meeting.
  82. The creditor demands a marriage take place between their family, and the indebted’s.
  83. The indebted must throw a sporting match in which they are favored to win. If they aren’t favored to win in any current sporting matches, they must enter a sport and achieve some note within it before their debt can be paid.
  84. The indebted must infiltrate some specified group and ferret out their secrets for the creditor.
  85. The indebted must find some way to drum up business for their creditor’s business venture.
  86. The indebted must allow their creditor to use their body while they sleep. Each morning, the indebted will awake within 1 mile of where they went to sleep. Sometimes they may have injuries, or be covered in someone else’s blood. They will not know what they did the night before.
  87. The creditor will establish some set amount of time. During that period, some or all of the experience points gained by the indebted will instead be gained by the creditor. To determine how much XP the creditor takes, roll 1d4 and multiply it by 25%.
  88. The indebted must contract a disease, which their creditor may or may not be able to provide. The creditor wishes to examine the progress of this disease in detail.
  89. The indebted must allow their body to host some parasite, which will constantly make suggestions within their brain, and may potentially even be able to influence their actions more directly.
  90. The indebted must offer themselves as host to a spirit. While possessed, they will be able to see what their body is doing, but will have no control over it. The possession will last until the spirit has finished what it left undone in life. What that is, is left to the referee to decide.
  91. The creditor wants 1d2 limbs from the indebted. They are prepared to safely remove these limbs, which they may attach to themselves, or use for some other insidious purpose. If only 1 limb is required, it may be either an arm or a leg at the referee’s preference. If 2 are required, it will be both one arm, and one leg.
  92. Someone the creditor cares about (perhaps even themselves) requires an organ transplant. Something which the body has two of, and which the indebted can live without. Something like a lung, or a bit of liver. The indebted has been determined to be a match for whomever needs this bit of guts, and must undergo the procedure to have it removed.
  93. The creditor is facing an issue in their lives, and needs someone to provide them with good advice. Whether the advice is good depends on how well their situation turns out when they follow it.
  94. The creditor requires that the indebted make a lifebond with them. Whenever the creditor takes damage, they will be healed by draining vitality from the indebted. Fortunately, the creditor lives a simple life. Anytime the indebted would be healed up to full, they instead are 1d6 – 2 hit points lower than their max.
  95. The indebted must donate their body to necromancy. The creditor will place a vile mark upon their body. When they die, the mark will automatically animate their body, which will then move with all haste to the creditor, so that it may be used in necromantic rituals. This prevents the indebted from ever being resurrected if they die.
  96. The indebted must perform a sacrilege, offending some certain god against which their creditor has enmity.
  97. The indebted must humiliate themselves in some fashion. In some cases this may merely be for the private enjoyment of their creditor. However, in most cases, their humiliation will need to be a public spectacle, severely damaging their reputation.
  98. The creditor, or someone whom the creditor likes, is currently due some punishment. The indebted must suffer this punishment in that person’s place. This may mean time spent in the pillory or dungeon, it may be torture, military service, or possibly even death. 
  99. The indebted must lie to someone who will trust them, misleading that person into making a bad decision, or thinking an issue has been taken care of when it actually hasn’t.
  100. The creditor is in a wonderful mood today, and will forgo any payment from the indebted. The simple act of helping is enough satisfaction for them.

As a closing note, I just want to point out that this is the single most challenging d100 table I’ve ever written. I’ve been tinkering with it on-and-off since early 2016. I don’t know if the time investment paid off, but if you like the amount of work I put into these posts, consider supporting me on Patreon. It goes a long way towards helping my writing along.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...