Last Words of the Megalomaniacal Bard

Remi Orvenna, Art for the Dirgesinger D&D 3.5 Prestige Class from Libris Mortem - An evil bard
Dirgesinger art from Libris Mortis

One of these days I’m going to run a campaign. Standard fantasy setting, plenty of dungeon crawling and orcs. Nothing too far out of the ordinary. Eventually I’ll introduce a big bad villain for the players to contend with. He’ll be a Bard, who charms his way into commanding the big evil army or whatever. That part isn’t very important.

The players will face many challenges and battles in hunting down this evil bard. But dice willing, they will eventually penetrate to the very heart of his citadel. They’ll battle him in his throne room, and he’ll have a lot of tricks up his sleeve. But they made it this far, and they’re prepared.

After a terrific battle, the players will have the villain at their mercy. He’ll lean back against his throne, and know he is defeated. He will no plead for his life, but he asks the players if they would permit him some final words. My players, I hope, would agree to this simple request.

The villain would then reach behind his throne, and pull out a large, strange looking lute-like instrument.

As my players looked at me, puzzled, I would hit play on Behind Blue Eyes by The Who.

I fully expect at least one of my players to punch me in the head. It will be worth it, because it will be god damned hilarious.

Posts with substance will resume tomorrow. Sorry for the spotty scheduling lately!

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